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Tag Name "Fart" (95)

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If I fail, the film industry writes me off as another statistic. If I succeed, they pay me a million bucks to fly out to Hollywood and fart.
George A. Romero
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She's a warm fart at Christmas.
Jethro Tull
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It having been a very cold night last night I had got some cold, and so in pain by wind, and a sure precursor of pain is sudden letting off farts, and when that stops, then my passages stop and my pain begins
Samuel Pepys
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Relationships are like farting, If you push too hard things could get messy real fast.
Kevin Hart
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Freedom, Truth, Honour — you could rattle off a hundred such words and behind every one of them would gather a thousand punks, pompous little farts, waving the banner with one hand and reaching under the table with the other.
Hunter S. Thompson
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We are here on Earth to fart around. Don't let anybody tell you any different.
Kurt Vonnegut
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Besides, when you say you're a feminist it annoys the bigots and the old farts and the prissy ladies so much, it's kind of irresistible.
Ursula K. Le Guin
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The only thing that bothers me is if I'm in a restaurant and I'm eating and someone says, 'Hey, mind if I smoke?' I always say, 'No. Mind if I fart?
Steve Martin
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I swear, guys in groups are capable of the stupidest things. Like war, Kellan says, heaping napkins and ketchup packets onto her tray. And jumping off rooftops. And lighting their farts on fire, she says.
Jay Asher
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Don't be more serious than God. God invented dog farts.
Peter Kreeft
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A fart is just your arse applauding.
Billy Connolly
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It's become absolutely horrible the way the people with the money decide they can fart in the kitchen.
Steven Soderbergh
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Did I not tell you earlier that a Jew is such a noble, precious jewel that God and all the angels dance when he farts?
Martin Luther
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You Know the Most Dangerous Thing In the Water? A Shark Fart.
Gary Busey
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Did you hear something, Nora?” Vee asked. “I thought I heard something.” “You definitely heard something,” I agreed. “Could that be … a dog fart I heard?” Vee asked me.
Becca Fitzpatrick
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The rest of the guys in Sabbath became boring old farts, and there I was, this crazy guy, still into wrecking hotel rooms and having parties.
Ozzy Osbourne
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Love is the fart Of every heart It pains the man when 'tis kept close, And others doth offend, when 'tis let loose.
John Suckling
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My father once told me, and it's stuck with me to this day: As you walk through life, every time you fart it pushes you forward.
Bob Saget
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Ah, babies! They’re more than just adorable little creatures on whom you can blame your farts.
Tina Fey
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ObamaCare is to health care as a fart is to an elevator.
Greg Gutfeld
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If I want to keep working as an actor, I'm going to become a comedian who does fart jokes.
Peter Sarsgaard
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Though I've turned 21, I don't drink. I'm an old hag now. I'm just an old fart.
Mena Suvari
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A man who farts in bed . . . is a man who loves life.
Muriel Barbery
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