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Woody Allen Inspirational Quotes (767)

Page 3 of 32
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More than any other time in history, mankind faces a crossroads. One path leads to despair and utter hopelessness. The other, to total extinction. Let us pray we have the wisdom to choose correctly.
Woody Allen
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If it turns out that there is a God...the worst that you can say about him is that basically he's an underachiever.
Woody Allen
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A deranged person is supposed to have the strength of ten men. I have the strength of one small boy... with polio.
Woody Allen
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People think I'm an artist because my films lose money.
Woody Allen
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The key point about a demonstration is that it must be seen. Hence the term demonstration. If a person demonstrates privately in his own home, this is not technically a demonstration but merely acting silly or behaving like an ass.
Woody Allen
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We live in far too permissive a society. Never before has pornography been this rampant. And those films are so badly lit!
Woody Allen
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I did not marry the first girl that I fell in love with, because there was a tremendous religious conflict, at the time. She was an atheist, and I was an agnostic.
Woody Allen
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Taste my tuna casserole - tell me if I put in too much hot fudge.
Woody Allen
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What a world. It could be so wonderful if it wasn't for certain people.
Woody Allen
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I should go to Paris and jump off of the Eiffel Tower. If I took the Concorde, I could be dead three hours earlier.
Woody Allen
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The prettiest women are almost always the most boring, and that is why some people feel there is no God.
Woody Allen
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One man starving puts a crimp in my evening.
Woody Allen
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All literature is a footnote to Faust. I have no idea what I mean by that.
Woody Allen
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Dear Mom and Dad, Leave $50,000 in a bag under the bridge on Decatur Street. If there is no bridge on Decatur Street, please build one.
Woody Allen
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I can't even make a leap of faith to believe in my own existence.
Woody Allen
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Money is not everything, but it is better than having one's health.
Woody Allen
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Just because you're paranoid doesn't mean they aren't out to get you.
Woody Allen
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Is old age really so terrible? Not if you've brushed your teeth faithfully.
Woody Allen
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My luck is getting worse and worse. Last night, for instance, I was mugged by a quaker.
Woody Allen
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I'm going to my psychoanalyst one more year, then I'm going to Lourdes.
Woody Allen
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How does gravity work? And if it were to cease suddenly, would certain restaurants still require a jacket?
Woody Allen
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If God is everywhere, I had concluded, then He is in food. Therefore, the more I ate the godlier I would become. Impelled by this new religious fervor, I glutted myself like a fanatic.
Woody Allen
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A man that has never lied to a woman has no respect for her feelings.
Woody Allen
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Skeptic that I was as an adolescent, I had recently come to believe in a Supreme Being after thumbing through a Victoria's Secret catalogue.
Woody Allen
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