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W S Gilbert Inspirational Quotes (96)

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I know everybody's income and what everybody earns, And I carefully compare it with the income-tax returns
W. S. Gilbert
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To sit in solemn silence on a dull, dark dock in a pestilential prison with a life-long lock awaiting the sensation of a short, sharp shock from a cheap and chippy chopper on a big, black block.
W. S. Gilbert
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When a felon s not engaged in his employment, Or maturing his felonious little plans, His capacity for innocent enjoyment Is just as great as any honest mans.
W. S. Gilbert
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Life's perhaps the only riddle That we shrink from giving up.
W. S. Gilbert
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He led his regiment from behind. He found it less exciting.
W. S. Gilbert
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If you give me your attention, I will tell you what I am: I'm a genuine philanthropist--all other kinds are sham. Each little fault of temper and each social defect In my erring fellow creatures, I endeavor to correct.
W. S. Gilbert
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A policeman's lot is not a happy one
W. S. Gilbert
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No good play is a success fine writing and high morals are useless on the stage. I have been scribbling twaddle for thirty-five years to suit the public taste, and I should know.
W. S. Gilbert
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When Wellington thrashed Bonaparte, As every child can tell, The House of Peers, throughout the war, Did nothing in particular, And did it very well
W. S. Gilbert
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On my face extended flat I was walloped with a cat For listening at the key-hole of the door.
W. S. Gilbert
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It isn't so much what's on the table that matters, as what's on the chairs.
W. S. Gilbert
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Oh, wouldn't the world seem dull and flat with nothing whatever to grumble at?
W. S. Gilbert
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So I fell in love with a rich attorney's Elderly ugly daughter.
W. S. Gilbert
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If your master is surly, from getting up early (And tempers are short in the morning), An inopportune joke is enough to provoke Him to give you, at once, a month's warning.
W. S. Gilbert
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I'm very good at integral and differential calculus, I know the scientific names of beings animalculous In short, in matters vegetable, animal, and mineral, I am the very model of a modern Major-General.
W. S. Gilbert
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Utopia's quite another land In her enterprising movements, She is England--with improvements
W. S. Gilbert
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Ah, pray no mistake, We are not shy We're very wide awake The Moon and I.
W. S. Gilbert
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Merely corroborative detail, intended to give artistic verisimilitude to an otherwise bald and unconvincing narrative.
W. S. Gilbert
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The Law is the true embodiment of everything that's excellent it has no kind of fault or flaw and I, my Lords, embody the Law.
W. S. Gilbert
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When every blessed thing you have is made of silver, or of gold, you long for simple pewter.
W. S. Gilbert
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The happiest hour a sailor sees Is when he's down At an inland town, With his Nancy on his knees, yo ho! And his arm around her waist!
W. S. Gilbert
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Oh! a private buffoon is a light-hearted loon, If you listen to popular rumour From morning to night he's so joyous and bright, And he bubbles with wit and good humour!
W. S. Gilbert
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All bayonets are bad.
W. S. Gilbert
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Is life a boon? If so, it must befall That Death, whene'er he call, Must call too soon.
W. S. Gilbert
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