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Tucker Max Inspirational Quotes (126)

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General reader feedback is usually pretty worthless. 99% of people give feedback that is irrelevant, stupid, or just flat out wrong. But that 1% of people who give good feedback are invaluable.
Tucker Max
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I masterbate in the shower. My action figures judge me. Especially the Justice League.
Tucker Max
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The narcissist act is not an act. I actually am a narcissist, very much so. My world revolves around me.
Tucker Max
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It used to be that companies with industrial economies of scale created business success. Now, success will come from the information economies of scale, either the ones with complete breadth, or complete depth.
Tucker Max
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The meaning of life is to create meaning for your life.
Tucker Max
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The general intellectual level of South Florida is somewhere just above functionally retarded.
Tucker Max
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If you want to be seen as courageous by some and hated by others, just say what you really think.
Tucker Max
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I could never kill myself. What if it doesn't work. Then I'll have failed at the only thing that could save me from my failures. Where do you go from there?
Tucker Max
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I take a lull from my CamelBak and choke at its potency. It tastes like bad decisions. It's perfect.
Tucker Max
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The hardest lesson I've had to learn in my life is that my intelligence is inversely correlated to my humility. The more I thought I knew, the less I actually knew.
Tucker Max
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Motherfucker. She leaves me no choice. Now I have to break her self-esteem, sleep with her and steal the shirt.
Tucker Max
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I’ve heard 14 year old meth addicted thai prostitutes say more prescient things than the woman that was supposedly a “professor
Tucker Max
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If you read the book, you're not a journalist. You're some impostor! No journalist actually does any work.
Tucker Max
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Men will treat you the way you let them. There is no such thing as 'deserving' respect you get what you demand from people.
Tucker Max
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I started writing because it was about making my friends laugh, and when you're talking to your friends, you can't bullshit.
Tucker Max
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You can't fill your emails with crap, at least not with my friends, because they're brutal. If something sucks, they'll tell you.
Tucker Max
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My favorite random email I got was from some guy who wrote: Mr. Max, with the hope of a six year old on the night before Christmas asking about Santa, I ask the same question: Do you really exist?
Tucker Max
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A lot of people think that since I'm drunk in my stories, I must be drunk 24 hours a day. What kind of stupid logic is that? It'd be like if you saw Michael Jordan at a restaurant and were like, Why aren't you in your basketball uniform? I leave out way more than I put in.
Tucker Max
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The vast majority of all consequences, especially in 21st century America, are completely meaningless bullshit.
Tucker Max
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The only thing that someone could say about me that would hurt me would be something that's true that I don't want to be.
Tucker Max
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The Big Five publishing companies are dinosaurs trying to survive in a post-meteor world. They won't.
Tucker Max
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Most of my success, I feel, comes from being a good editor as opposed to a great writer.
Tucker Max
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I will never understand why people get so upset at things I don't even remember saying.
Tucker Max
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If your parents ignored you, or if they are just not emotionally available, or if they yell a lot, that is a type of trauma.
Tucker Max
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