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Karl Pilkington Inspirational Quotes (120)

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Be the ugly one, look at the nice one.
Karl Pilkington
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A block of blood should not have the word cake after it...they might as well say shite gateau
Karl Pilkington
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You know, when you're a producer, you're a bit of a lackey. You're just making cups of tea and making sure they've got newspaper, stuff like that.
Karl Pilkington
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I think people would live a bit longer if they didn't know how old they were. Age puts restrictions on things.
Karl Pilkington
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They do it in Thai restaurants in London. You ask for a drink, and it comes in a glass with loads of seaweed and pebbles in it like a scene from Finding Nemo.
Karl Pilkington
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The reason there are so many gyms in London is because the amount of gay people who are here now.
Karl Pilkington
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I don't know any Londoners 'cos I'm from Manchester.
Karl Pilkington
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Who'd have thought the Frisbee would have caught on?
Karl Pilkington
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Now sometimes I don't know if I feel well. Because I've been in my body for years.
Karl Pilkington
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I'm a bit rubbish at knowing when something is good. But if it goes out and I can say, I wasn't as bad as I thought I would be, then I'll be happy. Until then, I'll be thinking, I shouldn't be here!
Karl Pilkington
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There was always something. It's like with this one, there's always something that's mad that I look back on it and go, that's pretty amazing to say that I've done that or been there.
Karl Pilkington
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Stop looking at the walls, look out the window.
Karl Pilkington
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A slug is always on its own. It's a lonely insect.
Karl Pilkington
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Being honest with you, it's not the 'great' wall of China. It's an all right wall. It's the 'All Right Wall of China.'
Karl Pilkington
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Every problem solved is a problem made.
Karl Pilkington
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Everywhere we walked we got plenty of attention due to the camera and sound men. The locals love to get on camera. [...] I'd seen footage of Gandhi surrounded like this and always thought it was because he was very popular, but now I wonder if it was just because he had a camera crew with him.
Karl Pilkington
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It's weird how me and that insect are miles apart in terms of lifestyle, yet we both like a biscuit.
Karl Pilkington
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Everyone is living for everyone else now. They're doing stuff so they can tell other people about it. I don't get all that social media stuff, I've always got other things I want to do - odd jobs around the house. No one wants to hear about that.
Karl Pilkington
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There’s fish in here that I’ve read about that are so see-through that they’re invisible. So I don’t even think they know they exist.
Karl Pilkington
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It's just hassle of having friends and family an' that.
Karl Pilkington
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From someone whose dad buys him a spade for Christmas, I thought you'd be grateful!
Karl Pilkington
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Whether it's a potato or a nut, it's a foodage!
Karl Pilkington
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But I'm not an idiot. At the end of the day, I've learned a lot.
Karl Pilkington
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The poorer people and criminals of Mexico who are not very religious but not quite atheists, either, worship Saint Death.
Karl Pilkington
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