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Johnny Carson Inspirational Quotes (83)

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Happiness is a tiger in your tank and a pussycat in your back seat.
Johnny Carson
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The Hollywood tradition I like best is called sucking up to the stars.
Johnny Carson
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What's all this fuss about plutonium? How can something named after a Disney character be dangerous?
Johnny Carson
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If life was fair, Elvis would be alive and all the impersonators would be dead.
Johnny Carson
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The Champagne they have stored is getting more valuable every year.
Johnny Carson
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Maybe we should hold the next [Olympic] games in Afghanistan and hope the Soviets pull out of that one too.
Johnny Carson
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An oxymoron? What's that? A moron who studies at Oxford?
Johnny Carson
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I don't think it's you that changes with success - it's the people around you who change. Because of your new status, they change in relation to you.
Johnny Carson
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Happiness is sitting down to watch some slides of your neighbor's vacation and finding out that he spent two weeks in a nudist colony.
Johnny Carson
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I owe one thing to my public - the best performance I can give.
Johnny Carson
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I have an ego like anybody else, but I don't need to be stoked by going before the public all the time.
Johnny Carson
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