X

Sort by

Quote length

Sentiment

Change font

Change background

Garry Shandling Inspirational Quotes (33)

Page 1 of 2
Filter & Style
Image
It's not the hair on your head that matters. It's the kind of hair you have inside.
Garry Shandling
Image
Women need to know that not all guys are going to hurt them the way that the guy did before they started dating me. I know guys I wouldn't go out with.
Garry Shandling
Image
In the year 2525, that song will be even less popular than when it first came out.
Garry Shandling
Image
I've never had anyone put on a puppet show to convince me of anything. And I've done a lot of stuff. I don't know that I would put the puppets on when I was pitching a show. This was the head of the studio putting a puppet show on. And I'll tell you, he wasn't bad.
Garry Shandling
Image
I like going into nature and that's where I'm happiest.
Garry Shandling
Image
I'm not a party guy. I don't carouse very much.
Garry Shandling
Image
I don''t like this reality television, I have to be honestI think real people should not be on television It''s for special people like us, people who have trained and studied to appear to be real
Garry Shandling
Image
I'm good in bed, actually, and I think I could learn to be a good communicator, too. The only trouble with that is it leads to marriage.
Garry Shandling
Image
I have such poor vision I can date anybody.
Garry Shandling
Image
I don't know why men are so fascinated with television and I think it has something to do with - if I may judge from my own father, who used to sit and stare at the TV while my mother was speaking to him - I think that's a man's way of tuning out.
Garry Shandling
Image
I'm very loyal in relationships. Even when I go out with my mom I don't look at other moms.
Garry Shandling
Image
Without comedy as a defense mechanism I wouldn't be able to survive.
Garry Shandling
Image
I once made love for an hour and fifteen minutes, but it was the night the clocks are set ahead.
Garry Shandling
Image
When I'm not in a relationship, I shave one leg. That way, when I sleep, it feels like I'm with a woman.
Garry Shandling
Image
You know it's funny that none of the regular late-night shows now use guest hosts the way Johnny did. No one talks about it much, but it's curious that they don't do it. They would each have to be asked the reason why they don't.
Garry Shandling
Image
Dr. Phil is hiding something. Otherwise, why wouldn't he use his last name?
Garry Shandling
Image
The only way I would go back to hosting would be if it were something entirely new. It would prevent me from wanting to host a standard-fare kind of talk show.
Garry Shandling
Image
I think it's one of the main negative emotional ingredients that fuels show business, because there's so much at stake and the fear of failure looms large.
Garry Shandling
Image
Nice guys finish first. If you don't know that, then you don't know where the finish line is.
Garry Shandling
Image
I remember learning to drive on my dad's lap. Did you guys ever do that? He'd work the brakes. I'd work the wheel. Then I went to take the driver's test and sat on the examiner's lap. I failed the exam. But he still writes to me. That's the really nice part.
Garry Shandling
Image
I'm dating a woman now who, evidently, is unaware of it.
Garry Shandling
Image
But I really like hosting, I think it's a strength of mine. It allows me to improvise, and I love the spontaneity of that, and I think I'm funny behind the desk when interviewing someone.
Garry Shandling
Image
I'm dating a homeless woman. It was easier talking her into staying over.
Garry Shandling
Image
My first appearance as a guest on The Tonight Show was in '81.
Garry Shandling
Previous
Next