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Eddie Izzard Inspirational Quotes (88)

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I'm a dyslexic person, so I avoid books.
Eddie Izzard
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Guns don't kill people, people kill people, and monkeys do too (if they have a gun).
Eddie Izzard
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I wanted to be less well-known in comedy.
Eddie Izzard
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If I were Achilles I would put my foot in a f**k off block of concrete!
Eddie Izzard
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But the Dutch speak four languages and smoke marijuana!
Eddie Izzard
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If you get too well-known, you can never be a comedian's comedian, it just won't sit well. But I'm fine with that. I'm fine with that label.
Eddie Izzard
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If there is a God, his plan is very similar to someone not having a plan.
Eddie Izzard
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When you're coming out, you have to deal with the whole world saying 'Oh! You're an abominable snowman'.
Eddie Izzard
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If you've never seen an elephant ski, then you've never been on acid.
Eddie Izzard
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I'd like to have sex with myself.
Eddie Izzard
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And the National Rifle Association says that, Guns don't kill people, people do, but I think the gun helps, you know? I think it helps. I just think just standing there going, Bang! That's not going to kill too many people, is it? You'd have to be really dodgy on the heart to have that.
Eddie Izzard
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Scrabble was invented by Nazis to piss off kids with dyslexia. This is true, they proved this one. The word dyslexia was invented by Nazis to piss off kids with dyslexia.
Eddie Izzard
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All humans can do more than they think they can do. So I think we can all actually be more superhuman than we think we can.
Eddie Izzard
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Poetry is very similar to music, only less notes and more words.
Eddie Izzard
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San Francisco! City of dreaming spires, people live here... Golden Gate Bridge, ahh the Romans came here.
Eddie Izzard
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The Death Star is just full of British actors opening doors and going,Oh... I... oh... What is it Lieutenant Sebastian? It's just the Rebels, sir... they're here. My God, man! Do they want tea? No, I think they're after something a bit more than that, sir. I don't know what it is, but they've brought a flag. Damn, that's dash cunning of them.
Eddie Izzard
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I try to keep performing as much as possible - I just like to. I used to take huge gaps off between gigs, now I just like to do stand-up gigs as much as I can.
Eddie Izzard
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If you think about determination, if people have a heart and are determined, they can get to that place. But there are a lot of negative people who were enormously determined. All the Nazis were determined. They wanted to murder everyone. Everyone with a bad heart, who doesn't care about people, I wish they hadn't started.
Eddie Izzard
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I just believe in the goodwill of people, the power of people to do something positive.
Eddie Izzard
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MAC gave me 55 lipsticks to test. These are the same lipsticks I got caught stealing by the police when I was 15. How ironic.
Eddie Izzard
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I want to live till I die. No more, no less.
Eddie Izzard
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Two languages in one brain? No one can live at that speed!
Eddie Izzard
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But puberty was... well, before puberty, at school, I didn't tell kids I was a transvestite 'cause I thought they might kill me with sticks, you know?
Eddie Izzard
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Danger could be my middle name... But it's John.
Eddie Izzard
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