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Douglas Adams Inspirational Quotes (311)

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Very strange people, physicists - in my experience the ones who aren't dead are in some way very ill.
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There are two things in particular that it [the computer industry] failed to foresee: one was the coming of the Internet(...) the other was the fact that the century would end.
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ABOYNE (vb.) To beat an expert at a game of skill by playing so appallingly that none of his clever tactics or strategies are of any use to him.
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Alltami (n.) The ancient art of being able to balance the hot and cold shower taps.
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Does God know he [exists]? Of course he does. Otherwise, you could not have asked the question, and I could not have answered.
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Six pints of bitter, said Ford Prefect. And quickly please, the world's about to end.
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The mere thought hadn't even begun to speculate about the merest possibility of crossing my mind.
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If there's anything more important than my ego around, I want it caught and shot now.
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And as he drove on, the rainclouds dragged down the sky after him, for, though he did not know it, Rob McKenna was a Rain God. All he knew was that his working days were miserable and he had a succession of lousy holidays. All the clouds knew was that they loved him and wanted to be near him, to cherish him, and to water him.
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One of the major problems encountered in time travel is not that of accidentally becoming your own father or mother. There is no problem involved in becoming your own father or mother that a broadminded and well-adjusted family can't cope with.
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The simple truth is that interstellar distances will not fit into the human imagination.
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What is this? Some sort of galactic hyperhearse?
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I rarely end up where I was intending to go, but often I end up somewhere I needed to be.
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I'm 48, which is a bit of a shock to me. Why only last year I thought I was a precocious young thing!
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Looking up into the night sky is looking into infinity — distance is incomprehensible and therefore meaningless
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Rather than arriving five hours late and flustered, it would be better all around if he were to arrive five hours and a few extra minutes late, but triumphantly in command.
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One of the most important things you learn from the internet is that there is no 'them' out there. It’s just an awful lot of 'us.'
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I only know as much about myself as my mind can work out under its current conditions. And its current conditions are not good.
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I teleported home last night with Ron and Sid and Meg Ron stole Meggy's heart away and I got Sidney's leg.
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Driving a Porsche in London is like bringing a Ming vase to a football game.
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Time doesn't necessarily happen in chronological order.
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She had what it took: great hair, a profound understanding of strategic lip gloss, the intelligence to understand the world and a tiny secret interior deadness which meant she didn’t care.
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The moment at which two people, approaching from opposite ends of a long passageway, recognize each other and immediately pretend they haven t. This is to avoid the ghastly embarrassment of having to continue recognizing each other the whole length of the corridor.
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It's part of the shape of the Universe. I only have to talk to somebody and they begin to hate me.
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