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Chris Rock Inspirational Quotes (199)

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I know what you're thinking: why is Chris Rock bagging groceries? But I dropped out of high school in the tenth grade, so if I couldn't tell jokes this is exactly what I'd be doing.
Chris Rock
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Before I was a comedian, I thought the coolest thing that would happen to me was being a teenager... Boy, was I wrong!
Chris Rock
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I'll probably pay more attention to the musicians in the pit than the stars because they're the closest you're going to get to normal people in the audience.
Chris Rock
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Daddy pays for the water, daddy pays for the gas, daddy pays for the electricity, and if daddy didn't pay for the electricity, he'd pay for the candle on your nightstand, so you can study for the big test tomorrow.
Chris Rock
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You don't need a critic to tell you people aren't laughing.
Chris Rock
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Karaoke isn't fair when you're a comedian. The whole idea is to get people laughing and enjoying themselves, and I'm a professional funny guy.
Chris Rock
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I have four jackets, five pants, whatever, that are all the same. If you see U2 in concert, they wear the same thing every night. They just got a bunch of them. Albert Einstein used to wear brown suits every day. Why waste brainpower on something that is trivial?
Chris Rock
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When you've been on a ghetto diet your entire life, you're just happy to get a large soda instead of a medium.
Chris Rock
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Dude, I didn't say Jude Law can't act. I didn't say Jude Law was in bad movies. I just said he's in every movie.
Chris Rock
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I just remember that whenever I got really mad or passionate, like in an argument, people would laugh, and I'd be dead serious. It would happen a lot. So it was like, Gee, I've got something here.
Chris Rock
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Tomorrow is more sure than just about anything else in the entire world.
Chris Rock
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My mother is the kind of woman you don't want to be in line behind at the supermarket. She has coupons for coupons.
Chris Rock
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I want to really take chances. I want to be funny in a lot of different ways. I'd like to be great. I want to reach for greatness.
Chris Rock
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If you live with a single parent, you don't see compromise. You witness a grown person living in a world where they do what they want to do. When you are raised by two parents, you are constantly watching compromise take place. Just by observing that, it made me a better person.
Chris Rock
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Stand-up is the only career like that where once you get really big at it, people kind of encourage you not to do it.
Chris Rock
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You can write a great country record and still be angry. Who's angrier than Toby Keith? He's angrier than the average 10 rappers.
Chris Rock
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You could be married and bored or single and lonely. Ain't no happiness nowhere.
Chris Rock
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Wealth is not about having a lot of money it's about having a lot of options.
Chris Rock
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It used to take years to become a junkie. But crack cut that down to 37 minutes.
Chris Rock
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It's easier to get on show business, the hard part is to maintain. Nobody stays famous forever.
Chris Rock
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You don’t need no gun control, you know what you need? We need some bullet control. Men, we need to control the bullets, that’s right. I think all bullets should cost five thousand dollars… five thousand dollars per bullet… You know why? Cause if a bullet cost five thousand dollars there would be no more innocent bystanders.
Chris Rock
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Money is the best lotion in the world.
Chris Rock
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There's a difference between racism and I don't know any better. I'm clueless. Racism is like, I'm trying to make you feel bad. That's racism.
Chris Rock
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Unlike flying or astral projection, walking through walls is an earthbound pursuit.
Chris Rock
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