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If those who give are conscious of their own generosity and those who receive feel indebted, they are no longer family but rather strangers doing business.

Zicheng Hong

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Zicheng Hong
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When the mind is possessed of reality, it feels tranquil and joyous even without music or song, and it produces a pure fragrance even without incense or tea.
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In dealing with good people one should be magnanimous in dealing with bad people one should be strict. In dealing with average people one should combine magnanimity and strictness.
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When one is not slipshod in small matters, not hypocritical in secret, and not reckless in disappointment, only then is one a true hero.
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Observe people with cool eyes, listen to their words with cool ears. Confront feelings with cool emotions, reflect on principles with a cool mind.
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Flowers should be viewed when half open, wine should be drunk only to subtle intoxication there is great fun in this. If you view flowers in full bloom and drink to drunkenness, it becomes a bad experience. Those who are living to the full should think about this.
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Soil with a lot of manure in it produces abundant crops water that is too clear has no fish. Therefore, enlightened people should maintain the capacity to accept impurities and should not be solitary perfectionists.
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A net set up to catch fish may snare a duck a mantis hunting an insect may itself be set upon by a sparrow. Machinations are hidden within machinations changes arise beyond changes. So how can wit and cleverness be relied upon?
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To notice people's deceptions yet not reveal it in words, to bear people's insults without showing any change of attitude-there is endless meaning in this, and also endless function.
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At dusk the sunset is beautifully bright at year's end the tangerines are even more fragrant. Therefore, at the end of their road, in their later years, enlightened people should be a hundred times more vital in spirit.
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Those who turn things around by themselves do not rejoice at gain or grieve over loss the whole world is the range they roam. Those who are themselves used by things hate it when events go against them and love it when they go their way the slightest thing can create binding entanglements.
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If you know that whatever is made inevitable breaks down, you needn't seek too hard for achievement. If you know that all living beings inevitably die, you needn't work too hard on health lore.
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When you are constantly hearing offensive words and always have some irritating matter in mind, only then do you have a whetstone for character development. If you hear only what pleases you, and deal only with what thrills you, then you are burying your life in deadly poison.
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Late at night, when everyone is quiet, sit alone and gaze into the mind then you notice illusion ending and reality appearing. You gain a great sense of potential in this every time. Once you have noticed reality appearing yet find that illusion is hard to escape, you also find yourself greatly humbled.
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There is a true Buddha in family life there is a real Tao in everyday activities. If people can be sincere and harmonious, promoting communication with a cheerful demeanor and friendly words, that is much better than formal meditation practice.
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You should not be too much of a purist in your way of life, for you need to be able to accept all that is foul. You should not be too clear in making distinctions in social interactions, for you need to accept everyone whether they are good or bad, wise or foolish.
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Public behavior is nurtured in private earthshaking measures come form careful steps.
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People are considered pure of heart when they do not approach power and pomp but those who can be near without being affected are the purest of all. People are considered high-minded when they do not know how to plot and contrive but those who know how yet do not do so are the highest of all.
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In matters of desire, don't get hastily involved because of easy availability once you get involved, you will sink in deeply. In matters of principle, don't back off for fear of difficulty once you back down, you will lose your ground entirely.
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Delicious foods are drugs that will inflame the gut and rot the bones, but there is no harm if one eats moderately. Delightful things are all purveyors of destruction and decadence, but there is no regret if one enjoys them moderately.
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Valuing unusual conduct is not as good as being careful about ordinary actions.
Zicheng Hong