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Element of surprise is really fun for me in comedy. I have to be surprised, and everything's been done.
Zach Galifianakis
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Zach Galifianakis
Age: 55
Born: 1969
Born: October 1
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Zacharius Knight Galifinakis
Zachary Knight Galifianakis
Surprise
Elements
Fun
Comedy
Everything
Done
Really
Surprised
Element
More quotes by Zach Galifianakis
That's one of the great things about comedy: we can - and should - say the things that other people aren't supposed to say. If we didn't do that, if we didn't push against those limits, we'd just be standing around onstage and yelling.
Zach Galifianakis
I call my balls the bush twins.
Zach Galifianakis
A good stand-up, you lead the audience. You don't kowtow to the audience. Sometimes the audience is wrong. I always think the audience is wrong.
Zach Galifianakis
I think if they put a laugh track on 'Intervention,' it would be funny.
Zach Galifianakis
I do whatever comes my way. But I get burned out on stage. It's a lonely world. I think part of the romanticism about being on the road is you get to meet a lot of - my mom once told me, You've probably got a woman at every port. Like I'm a pirate. Obviously she doesn't know her son that well.
Zach Galifianakis
When you look like I do its hard to get a table for one at Chucky Cheese.
Zach Galifianakis
'Baskets' isn't a CBS show. Nothing against that, but this is an off-kilter show on cable that the channel lets you do interesting things. Look, if it works, it works. And if it doesn't, it's just a miniseries.
Zach Galifianakis
When you're doing standup you're kind of doing, Hey. I thought of this. This may be funny.
Zach Galifianakis
I do not have a helmet. But this is a wig, so it's a little protective.
Zach Galifianakis
I don't like cursing in movies. I feel like cursing has become the new hackiness. You try to find substitutions for cursing.
Zach Galifianakis
I don't want to do an edgy show, I didn't want bad language. I think edginess is the new hackiness.
Zach Galifianakis
I try to write three jokes every day. I don't sit down and write them, it's just things that pop into my head. Then I'll go watch it fail onstage that night.
Zach Galifianakis
My girlfriend looks a little like Charlize Theron...and a lot like Patrick Ewing.
Zach Galifianakis
The other day, I got a henna tattoo that says Forever.
Zach Galifianakis
I have to stop crying when I watch The View. It's not because of the topics at hand, I just feel sorry for that couch.
Zach Galifianakis
I just could just shave my beard, and nobody would recognize me. Although I look like Jodie Foster.
Zach Galifianakis
Yesterday, I masturbated for 45 minutes... with salad tongs.
Zach Galifianakis
I want to do another reality show. It's based on The Mole. It's about sexually transmitted diseases. It's called God, I Hope That's a Mole.
Zach Galifianakis
I don't know what my assistant would do besides get me pot.
Zach Galifianakis
I'm not versed enough in constitutional law to run for office. I'd have to go back to school or something.
Zach Galifianakis
