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My girlfriend and I went to a dinner party the other night and we ended up playing charades. There was another couple there that was deaf. They were so good.
Zach Galifianakis
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Zach Galifianakis
Age: 55
Born: 1969
Born: October 1
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Zacharius Knight Galifinakis
Zachary Knight Galifianakis
Another
Dinner
Good
Couple
Humor
Playing
Went
Charades
Party
Deaf
Funny
Ended
Night
Girlfriend
More quotes by Zach Galifianakis
I don't want to do an edgy show, I didn't want bad language. I think edginess is the new hackiness.
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I think comedy does have that powerful thing that doesn't seem too preachy because you're also making people laugh, so it's really kind of a good tool for messaging.
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People are trying to prove things. And I probably have that. I probably do. Probably guilty of it, in a way.
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I was just thinking how unfortunate it'd be to be a fat girl named Candy.
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I wonder if in 2050 there will be a movie called, 'Dude, Where's My Spaceship'
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You save 15 more minutes of sleep if you are a man and you don't have to shave.
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Don't boo people! Don't boo! Be more specific! Like, 'WHY ARE YOU DOING THAT?! I HATE THAT! I HATE IT!'
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I'm terrible at heights. I hate it. I'm glad I'm only 5'7.
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I once walked in on my grandparents making love...And that's why I don't eat raisins.
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I think those neighborhood signs that say 'slow children playing' are mean.
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My New Year's resolution was to stop saying 'You go, girl' to myself.
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There was a long time where I was an artist in quotes, who had no money. But I guess back then I also never had a girlfriend.
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Yesterday, I masturbated for 45 minutes... with salad tongs.
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I haven't been hit since Leon Spinks hit me in '92.
Zach Galifianakis
I've always wanted to have a Greek sitcom called Olive Lucy.
Zach Galifianakis
I try to write three jokes every day. I don't sit down and write them, it's just things that pop into my head. Then I'll go watch it fail onstage that night.
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You know you have a drinking problem when the bartender knows your name -- and you've never been to that bar before.
Zach Galifianakis
The problem with these interviews is that there's no sarcastic font.
Zach Galifianakis
I wish I could sit back and say, 'Oh, I'm gonna wait for a Merchant-Ivory film to come my way. Or Ivory-Merchant. Whatever it's called. But you just take what's given and then, hopefully, down the road you can be more choosy and only do, say, Wayans brothers movies. That's my goal: to be more Merchant-Ivory-Wayans.
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I don't want my personal life to change. I don't understand why people strive for fame. I know it's ironic for me to be saying this, but this will be the last one I do.
Zach Galifianakis
