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My father used to beat me with his belt...while it was still on him.
Zach Galifianakis
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Zach Galifianakis
Age: 55
Born: 1969
Born: October 1
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Zacharius Knight Galifinakis
Zachary Knight Galifianakis
Still
Belts
Beat
Beats
Humor
Funny
Father
Stills
Used
Belt
More quotes by Zach Galifianakis
Have you seen that show on CBS called 'The Amazing Race'? Is that show about white people?
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I'm terrible at heights. I hate it. I'm glad I'm only 5'7.
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I understand Tea Partyers' anger with the system, but they are in way over their heads and often racially motivated, and I can't be part of that.
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My New Year's resolution was to stop saying 'You go, girl' to myself.
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I'll never forget my grandmother's last words. She said 'What are you doing?'
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I am not into publicity. I'm not good at it. I get anxiety about it.
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Reciting lines is hard making stuff up is much, much easier.
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I'm an American so its kind of hard for me to talk about 9/11. So whenever someone brings it up in a conversation, I say I didn't like 9/11.
Zach Galifianakis
You know you're getting fat when your socks don't fit.
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The whole thing about working in front of the camera is to make people laugh when they're not supposed to.
Zach Galifianakis
I am going to be the next Ryan Gosling.
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I don't like to have anybody tell me to be in a place at certain times. That's kind of the advantage of stand up. You're self-employed.
Zach Galifianakis
I don't want to do an edgy show, I didn't want bad language. I think edginess is the new hackiness.
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I'm writing a book about Siamese Twins that are attached at the nose. It's called: Stop Staring at Me!
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I tend to think of myself as a one-man wolf pack.
Zach Galifianakis
Whether you are on the Right or the Left, everyone can agree that there are a lot of outside influences in American politics that are not good for the system. There's just too much money.
Zach Galifianakis
I've never been in love... But I imagine it's similar to the feeling you get when you see your waiter arriving with your food
Zach Galifianakis
When I do stand-up for a long time, I'll get burned out, then I'll get an acting gig. For me, the grass is always greener. I'd like to do a mixture of all of it. My goal is just to do small movies that I've written. That's what I'm trying to do now, just write smaller movies.
Zach Galifianakis
I have a lot of growing up to do. I realized that the other day inside my fort.
Zach Galifianakis
I know my face is turning red. I don't want you to interpret it as being embarrassed. It's rage. The color of my face is rage.
Zach Galifianakis
