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I have to stop crying when I watch The View. It's not because of the topics at hand, I just feel sorry for that couch.

Zach Galifianakis

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Zach Galifianakis
Age: 55
Born: 1969
Born: October 1
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Zacharius Knight Galifinakis
Zachary Knight Galifianakis
Funny
Sorry
Hands
View
Feel
Watches
Feels
Watch
Couch
Humor
Couches
Views
Topics
Stop
Crying
Hand
Cry

More quotes by Zach Galifianakis

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My stand-up is more like how I am in real life. I don't really do a character thing in stand-up. It's just a bunch of sentences that are supposed to be funny.
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My forte is awkwardness.
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You know, sometimes if you work - if you do a lot of takes and you work long hours, for me, at least, there is a delirium that starts kicking in on the fifteenth hour, and that can help. Below the just thirteenth hour is where I have a concern, because everybody's so tired.
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I'd like to do a reality show with four white people...who are dropped off in a really bad black neighborhood. And the show would be called...Cracker Hunt.
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We talked about politics constantly in my family growing up in North Carolina. There were always debates. Being of Greek background, it's in our blood to drink coffee and talk politics.
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My comfort zone is press conferences.
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The problem with these interviews is that there's no sarcastic font.
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I'm terrible about people wanting to take pictures with me. I'm a giant baby about it. They treat you like a cartoon. There's nothing you can do except make light of it.
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We all know how funny Morrissey is. Actually, you know what? I say that sarcastically. His songs are some of the funniest songs I've ever heard in my life. I mean, really. I mean, not that the Girlfriend in a Coma is, like, really funny.
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I don't know what my assistant would do besides get me pot.
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Tigers love pepper...they hate cinnamon.
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I kind of put myself out there as is. I'm a quiet person. I don't know if that's surprising. I'm a Pilates junkie.
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I'll never forget my grandmother's last words. She said 'What are you doing?'
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I like characters that are fragile and a little bit on the edge .
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Privacy is big for me. To do interviews even, I have a very love/hate with it.
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Do you ever do something, and then think to yourself: That's So Raven?
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My brother has ADD, which is weird because he drives a Ford Focus. I told my brother that joke but he didn't laugh because he got distracted by my shoe strings.
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I tend to think of myself as a one-man wolf pack.
Zach Galifianakis
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You know how some people have gay-dar? I have fat-dar. I can automatically tell if you're fat or not. And I also have cerebral-palsy-dar.
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I find anger to be funny. I find people that are so wrapped up in their own personalities to be funny, and lost. Like myself in real life.
Zach Galifianakis