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I'm writing a book about Siamese Twins that are attached at the nose. It's called: Stop Staring at Me!
Zach Galifianakis
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Zach Galifianakis
Age: 55
Born: 1969
Born: October 1
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Zacharius Knight Galifinakis
Zachary Knight Galifianakis
Called
Siamese
Funny
Twins
Book
Attached
Writing
Nose
Noses
Staring
Humor
Stop
More quotes by Zach Galifianakis
American society loves to prop people up and then take them down.
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Reciting lines is hard making stuff up is much, much easier.
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I would have changed my last name if being famous were my goal.
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There's more to life than being an actor in a Hollywood movie. I'm not going to adapt my life after that existence, where a lot of people do. And they get the publicist, and they get all that stuff, and it becomes them. I think it's a stupid way to live your life. A really dumb way to live your life.
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I like dark comedies. That's why I like the Wayans Brothers.
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I'm an American so its kind of hard for me to talk about 9/11. So whenever someone brings it up in a conversation, I say I didn't like 9/11.
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There was a long time where I was an artist in quotes, who had no money. But I guess back then I also never had a girlfriend.
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You're not supposed to be accepting trophies. You're supposed to be in the back being mad that people are getting trophies.
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I don't mean to be gross, but the only time it's good to yell I have diarrhea is when you're playing Scrabble because it's worth a shitload of points.
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I think if they put a laugh track on 'Intervention,' it would be funny.
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My headshot is a scratch and sniff, it smells like failure and onions.
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The whole thing about working in front of the camera is to make people laugh when they're not supposed to.
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At what age do you think it's appropriate to tell a highway it's adopted?
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The word abbreviation sure is long for what it means.
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Whether you are on the Right or the Left, everyone can agree that there are a lot of outside influences in American politics that are not good for the system. There's just too much money.
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I'll never forget my grandmother's last words. She said 'What are you doing?'
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'Baskets' isn't a CBS show. Nothing against that, but this is an off-kilter show on cable that the channel lets you do interesting things. Look, if it works, it works. And if it doesn't, it's just a miniseries.
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My forte is awkwardness.
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I'm not versed enough in constitutional law to run for office. I'd have to go back to school or something.
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My girlfriend and I went to a dinner party the other night and we ended up playing charades. There was another couple there that was deaf. They were so good.
Zach Galifianakis
