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I'm not cynical when it comes to things that are important. I'm cynical about pop culture and all that horseshit.
Zach Galifianakis
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Zach Galifianakis
Age: 55
Born: 1969
Born: October 1
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Zacharius Knight Galifinakis
Zachary Knight Galifianakis
Comes
Important
Things
Cynical
Pops
Culture
More quotes by Zach Galifianakis
I'm Greek. My body produces feta cheese.
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When a role seems fun it's easy to play. It kind of comes organically.
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I would have changed my last name if being famous were my goal.
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I haven't been hit since Leon Spinks hit me in '92.
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I try to write three jokes every day. I don't sit down and write them, it's just things that pop into my head. Then I'll go watch it fail onstage that night.
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I love playing a curmudgeon. I just love playing a sour guy.
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When I was in high school I used to sit by myself in the cafeteria - not necessarily by choice - but I thought it was funny to talk to people that weren't there.
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I am not into publicity. I'm not good at it. I get anxiety about it.
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You save 15 more minutes of sleep if you are a man and you don't have to shave.
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If you read my blog, you know I'm a pilates freak. And by pilates, I mean waffles.
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You know you have a drinking problem when the bartender knows your name -- and you've never been to that bar before.
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The word abbreviation sure is long for what it means.
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Do you remember that kid that had sex with his high school teacher? I was reading online that he died today. He died from hi-fiveing.
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I live in Los Angeles and I had been drinking one night, so I was on the walk of fame and I saw Tony Danza's star and I started urinating on it. Just yelling out, 'Who's the boss now?'
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The problem with these interviews is that there's no sarcastic font.
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But comedy is like music, it appeals to some people. Some people like Creed, those people are usually pretty stupid. But they probably also like Carrot Top. I would say that they're part of the same ilk.
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Four years ago on this very day I tried to take my own life. And I said, Zach, do it in front of your co-workers and end the misery. I don't know how many of you ever tried to jump off of a Pizza Hut, but you'll just get a sprained ankle out of the deal. Then you'll have to go back inside, and serve crazy bread.
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I'm writing a book about Siamese Twins that are attached at the nose. It's called: Stop Staring at Me!
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I don't like to have anybody tell me to be in a place at certain times. That's kind of the advantage of stand up. You're self-employed.
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I've always wanted to have a Greek sitcom called Olive Lucy.
Zach Galifianakis
