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You know it's time to do the laundry when you dry off with a sneaker.
Zach Galifianakis
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Zach Galifianakis
Age: 55
Born: 1969
Born: October 1
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Zacharius Knight Galifinakis
Zachary Knight Galifianakis
Sneaker
Sneakers
Laundry
Dry
Humor
Funny
Time
More quotes by Zach Galifianakis
My name is Zach Galifianakis and I hope I'm pronouncing that right. I'm named after my granddad, my middle name. My name is Zach Granddad Galifianakis.
Zach Galifianakis
I don't like cursing in movies. I feel like cursing has become the new hackiness. You try to find substitutions for cursing.
Zach Galifianakis
You're not supposed to be accepting trophies. You're supposed to be in the back being mad that people are getting trophies.
Zach Galifianakis
When I do stand-up for a long time, I'll get burned out, then I'll get an acting gig. For me, the grass is always greener. I'd like to do a mixture of all of it. My goal is just to do small movies that I've written. That's what I'm trying to do now, just write smaller movies.
Zach Galifianakis
I've always been attracted to sad. If you look at Woody Allen movies, he's often playing a sad clown, and it's always been interesting. And angry clown is even more interesting.
Zach Galifianakis
I'm terrible about people wanting to take pictures with me. I'm a giant baby about it. They treat you like a cartoon. There's nothing you can do except make light of it.
Zach Galifianakis
I call my balls the bush twins.
Zach Galifianakis
When I was in high school I used to sit by myself in the cafeteria - not necessarily by choice - but I thought it was funny to talk to people that weren't there.
Zach Galifianakis
Tigers love pepper...they hate cinnamon.
Zach Galifianakis
I don't mean to be gross, but the only time it's good to yell I have diarrhea is when you're playing Scrabble because it's worth a shitload of points.
Zach Galifianakis
I'll never forget my grandmother's last words. She said 'What are you doing?'
Zach Galifianakis
I live in Los Angeles and I had been drinking one night, so I was on the walk of fame and I saw Tony Danza's star and I started urinating on it. Just yelling out, 'Who's the boss now?'
Zach Galifianakis
I dream of starting a three-man country trio called the Chixie Dicks.
Zach Galifianakis
It's fun for me to couple emotion with comedy. I think it helps comedy. I think a lot of times American comedies don't play on emotion too much.
Zach Galifianakis
I don't like to have anybody tell me to be in a place at certain times. That's kind of the advantage of stand up. You're self-employed.
Zach Galifianakis
If you read my blog, you know I'm a pilates freak. And by pilates, I mean waffles.
Zach Galifianakis
I wonder if in 2050 there will be a movie called, 'Dude, Where's My Spaceship'
Zach Galifianakis
I like dark comedies. That's why I like the Wayans Brothers.
Zach Galifianakis
I don't want to do an edgy show, I didn't want bad language. I think edginess is the new hackiness.
Zach Galifianakis
My real last name is Galifianakisburg.
Zach Galifianakis
