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Reciting lines is hard making stuff up is much, much easier.

Zach Galifianakis

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Zach Galifianakis
Age: 55
Born: 1969
Born: October 1
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Zacharius Knight Galifinakis
Zachary Knight Galifianakis
Stuff
Hard
Much
Reciting
Easier
Lines
Making

More quotes by Zach Galifianakis

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You save 15 more minutes of sleep if you are a man and you don't have to shave.
Zach Galifianakis
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I do whatever comes my way. But I get burned out on stage. It's a lonely world. I think part of the romanticism about being on the road is you get to meet a lot of - my mom once told me, You've probably got a woman at every port. Like I'm a pirate. Obviously she doesn't know her son that well.
Zach Galifianakis
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I don't want to do an edgy show, I didn't want bad language. I think edginess is the new hackiness.
Zach Galifianakis
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I get burned out on standup. But I like acting. I do like it. But sometimes you just feel like a monkey. You just feel like a complete tool. But I like it. I do like it. Stand-up is just more free. A lot more freedom because you just do what you want to do.
Zach Galifianakis
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I'm not cynical when it comes to things that are important. I'm cynical about pop culture and all that horseshit.
Zach Galifianakis
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The word abbreviation sure is long for what it means.
Zach Galifianakis
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Did you ever wake up with an erection...and find yourself in a massage chair at Brookstone? And you yell to the sales clerk I'll take it!
Zach Galifianakis
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That's one of the great things about comedy: we can - and should - say the things that other people aren't supposed to say. If we didn't do that, if we didn't push against those limits, we'd just be standing around onstage and yelling.
Zach Galifianakis
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Head gear, plus acne equals...table for one in the cafeteria.
Zach Galifianakis
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I like dark comedies. That's why I like the Wayans Brothers.
Zach Galifianakis
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A good stand-up, you lead the audience. You don't kowtow to the audience. Sometimes the audience is wrong. I always think the audience is wrong.
Zach Galifianakis
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Do you remember that kid that had sex with his high school teacher? I was reading online that he died today. He died from hi-fiveing.
Zach Galifianakis
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My headshot is a scratch and sniff, it smells like failure and onions.
Zach Galifianakis
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It's fun for me to couple emotion with comedy. I think it helps comedy. I think a lot of times American comedies don't play on emotion too much.
Zach Galifianakis
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People are trying to prove things. And I probably have that. I probably do. Probably guilty of it, in a way.
Zach Galifianakis
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I am going to be the next Ryan Gosling.
Zach Galifianakis
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The other day, I got a henna tattoo that says Forever.
Zach Galifianakis
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When you're doing standup you're kind of doing, Hey. I thought of this. This may be funny.
Zach Galifianakis
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I like to read the bible in public places where people are watching me read it. And I like to mumur out to myself: 'Bullshit!'
Zach Galifianakis
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Inappropriateness is funny to me. Rudeness is hilarious.
Zach Galifianakis