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My dad doesn't get any of my jokes. He laughs at them, but he doesn't understand them. He's just laughing because people around him are laughing.
Zach Galifianakis
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Zach Galifianakis
Age: 55
Born: 1969
Born: October 1
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Zacharius Knight Galifinakis
Zachary Knight Galifianakis
Dad
Jokes
Laughing
Understand
Doesn
Around
People
Laughs
More quotes by Zach Galifianakis
I dream of moving to India, or Pakistan, and becoming a cabdriver.
Zach Galifianakis
I am not into publicity. I'm not good at it. I get anxiety about it.
Zach Galifianakis
I've been happily dedicated to the same woman for a number of years. I never even look at other women.
Zach Galifianakis
I think comedy is a really, really good tool for trying to say something.
Zach Galifianakis
'Baskets' isn't a CBS show. Nothing against that, but this is an off-kilter show on cable that the channel lets you do interesting things. Look, if it works, it works. And if it doesn't, it's just a miniseries.
Zach Galifianakis
The whole thing about working in front of the camera is to make people laugh when they're not supposed to.
Zach Galifianakis
You know how some people have gay-dar? I have fat-dar. I can automatically tell if you're fat or not. And I also have cerebral-palsy-dar.
Zach Galifianakis
I like characters that are fragile and a little bit on the edge .
Zach Galifianakis
I've never been in love... But I imagine it's similar to the feeling you get when you see your waiter arriving with your food
Zach Galifianakis
I'm writing a book about Siamese Twins that are attached at the nose. It's called: Stop Staring at Me!
Zach Galifianakis
I have a lot of growing up to do. I realized that the other day inside my fort.
Zach Galifianakis
I'm terrible at heights. I hate it. I'm glad I'm only 5'7.
Zach Galifianakis
I want to do another reality show. It's based on The Mole. It's about sexually transmitted diseases. It's called God, I Hope That's a Mole.
Zach Galifianakis
I don't like to have anybody tell me to be in a place at certain times. That's kind of the advantage of stand up. You're self-employed.
Zach Galifianakis
Privacy is big for me. To do interviews even, I have a very love/hate with it.
Zach Galifianakis
I was just thinking how unfortunate it'd be to be a fat girl named Candy.
Zach Galifianakis
I get burned out on standup. But I like acting. I do like it. But sometimes you just feel like a monkey. You just feel like a complete tool. But I like it. I do like it. Stand-up is just more free. A lot more freedom because you just do what you want to do.
Zach Galifianakis
But comedy is like music, it appeals to some people. Some people like Creed, those people are usually pretty stupid. But they probably also like Carrot Top. I would say that they're part of the same ilk.
Zach Galifianakis
I wish I could sit back and say, 'Oh, I'm gonna wait for a Merchant-Ivory film to come my way. Or Ivory-Merchant. Whatever it's called. But you just take what's given and then, hopefully, down the road you can be more choosy and only do, say, Wayans brothers movies. That's my goal: to be more Merchant-Ivory-Wayans.
Zach Galifianakis
I like dark comedies. That's why I like the Wayans Brothers.
Zach Galifianakis
