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I would start a revolution, but I just bought a hammock.

Zach Galifianakis

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Zach Galifianakis
Age: 55
Born: 1969
Born: October 1
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Zacharius Knight Galifinakis
Zachary Knight Galifianakis
Bought
Revolution
Humor
Start
Funny
Would
Hammock
Hammocks

More quotes by Zach Galifianakis

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I've always been attracted to sad. If you look at Woody Allen movies, he's often playing a sad clown, and it's always been interesting. And angry clown is even more interesting.
Zach Galifianakis
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When you look like I do its hard to get a table for one at Chucky Cheese.
Zach Galifianakis
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I think if you come out to California trying to be an actor, it's pretty hard. There's desperation. A lot of people are desperate, and a lot of people are clueless, including me. It's hard to try to figure it out. I've never told you, but I have head shots that if you saw them... they're so terrible! It's so embarrassing.
Zach Galifianakis
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My brother has ADD, which is weird because he drives a Ford Focus. I told my brother that joke but he didn't laugh because he got distracted by my shoe strings.
Zach Galifianakis
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Four years ago on this very day I tried to take my own life. And I said, Zach, do it in front of your co-workers and end the misery. I don't know how many of you ever tried to jump off of a Pizza Hut, but you'll just get a sprained ankle out of the deal. Then you'll have to go back inside, and serve crazy bread.
Zach Galifianakis
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I think if they put a laugh track on 'Intervention,' it would be funny.
Zach Galifianakis
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My girlfriend looks a little like Charlize Theron...and a lot like Patrick Ewing.
Zach Galifianakis
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Inappropriateness is funny to me. Rudeness is hilarious.
Zach Galifianakis
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As a comic, it's anti-comedy to be known. I think a lot of comedic actors get lost in this world of Hollywood and all this stuff. They lose what brought them there in the first place. I'm very trepidatious about it.
Zach Galifianakis
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It's not good for comedy to be like, 'Thanks for liking me'. Being popular is poison.
Zach Galifianakis
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Do you ever do something, and then think to yourself: That's So Raven?
Zach Galifianakis
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I just try to keep myself a traditionalist. I liked being an underground comic doing my thing. I want to maintain that. I just do.
Zach Galifianakis
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I try to write three jokes every day. I don't sit down and write them, it's just things that pop into my head. Then I'll go watch it fail onstage that night.
Zach Galifianakis
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My name is Zach Galifianakis and I hope I'm pronouncing that right. I'm named after my granddad, my middle name. My name is Zach Granddad Galifianakis.
Zach Galifianakis
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People get TV deals by doing something in their grandmother's basement. It is definitely the wave. Everybody is trying to do all that stuff. I mean, the Internet is the only reason that I've gotten work is because I've somehow created a line and people have seen it. And then I've been asked to auditions.
Zach Galifianakis
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Actually, I used to be a busboy in a strip joint in New York and so I hate strip joints. I'm not that kind of person.
Zach Galifianakis
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American society loves to prop people up and then take them down.
Zach Galifianakis
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That's one of the great things about comedy: we can - and should - say the things that other people aren't supposed to say. If we didn't do that, if we didn't push against those limits, we'd just be standing around onstage and yelling.
Zach Galifianakis
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When you're doing standup you're kind of doing, Hey. I thought of this. This may be funny.
Zach Galifianakis
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I don't know what my assistant would do besides get me pot.
Zach Galifianakis