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I think those neighborhood signs that say 'slow children playing' are mean.
Zach Galifianakis
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Zach Galifianakis
Age: 55
Born: 1969
Born: October 1
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Zacharius Knight Galifinakis
Zachary Knight Galifianakis
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Neighborhood
Thinking
Slow
Humor
Playing
Comedy
Funny
Children
Mean
Signs
More quotes by Zach Galifianakis
Reciting lines is hard making stuff up is much, much easier.
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I would start a revolution, but I just bought a hammock.
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I don't like cursing in movies. I feel like cursing has become the new hackiness. You try to find substitutions for cursing.
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I'm terrible about people wanting to take pictures with me. I'm a giant baby about it. They treat you like a cartoon. There's nothing you can do except make light of it.
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I'm the most mellow person offstage. I think it's just, going onstage lets me get out some frustration that I'm too shy to do in real life. Instead of doing it in private, I'd rather do it in front of 1,000 people who've paid $25 to see me lose my mind.
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My headshot is a scratch and sniff, it smells like failure and onions.
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I am not into publicity. I'm not good at it. I get anxiety about it.
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You know you're getting fat when your socks don't fit.
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The other day, I got a henna tattoo that says Forever.
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I think comedy is a really, really good tool for trying to say something.
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I am going to be the next Ryan Gosling.
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I have to stop crying when I watch The View. It's not because of the topics at hand, I just feel sorry for that couch.
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My stand-up is more like how I am in real life. I don't really do a character thing in stand-up. It's just a bunch of sentences that are supposed to be funny.
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You're not supposed to be accepting trophies. You're supposed to be in the back being mad that people are getting trophies.
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There was a long time where I was an artist in quotes, who had no money. But I guess back then I also never had a girlfriend.
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Don't boo people! Don't boo! Be more specific! Like, 'WHY ARE YOU DOING THAT?! I HATE THAT! I HATE IT!'
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I've never been in love... But I imagine it's similar to the feeling you get when you see your waiter arriving with your food
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I think if you come out to California trying to be an actor, it's pretty hard. There's desperation. A lot of people are desperate, and a lot of people are clueless, including me. It's hard to try to figure it out. I've never told you, but I have head shots that if you saw them... they're so terrible! It's so embarrassing.
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I don't want my personal life to change. I don't understand why people strive for fame. I know it's ironic for me to be saying this, but this will be the last one I do.
Zach Galifianakis
When you look like I do its hard to get a table for one at Chucky Cheese.
Zach Galifianakis
