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If you read my blog, you know I'm a pilates freak. And by pilates, I mean waffles.
Zach Galifianakis
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Zach Galifianakis
Age: 55
Born: 1969
Born: October 1
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Zacharius Knight Galifinakis
Zachary Knight Galifianakis
Waffles
Pilates
Blog
Freak
Read
Mean
More quotes by Zach Galifianakis
American society loves to prop people up and then take them down.
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I do not have a helmet. But this is a wig, so it's a little protective.
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I don't want my personal life to change. I don't understand why people strive for fame. I know it's ironic for me to be saying this, but this will be the last one I do.
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The other day, I got a henna tattoo that says Forever.
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I was just thinking how unfortunate it'd be to be a fat girl named Candy.
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When you're doing standup you're kind of doing, Hey. I thought of this. This may be funny.
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I'll never forget my grandmother's last words. She said 'What are you doing?'
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You know, sometimes if you work - if you do a lot of takes and you work long hours, for me, at least, there is a delirium that starts kicking in on the fifteenth hour, and that can help. Below the just thirteenth hour is where I have a concern, because everybody's so tired.
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I live in Los Angeles and I had been drinking one night, so I was on the walk of fame and I saw Tony Danza's star and I started urinating on it. Just yelling out, 'Who's the boss now?'
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When a role seems fun it's easy to play. It kind of comes organically.
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I've been happily dedicated to the same woman for a number of years. I never even look at other women.
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I'm an American so its kind of hard for me to talk about 9/11. So whenever someone brings it up in a conversation, I say I didn't like 9/11.
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My forte is awkwardness.
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The congressmen and senators used to go have a drink in D.C. They would disagree all day long, but they would find that time to sit down and learn about each other personally. I think that's totally wiped out I don't think it really exists anymore.
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I don't mean to be gross, but the only time it's good to yell I have diarrhea is when you're playing Scrabble because it's worth a shitload of points.
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It's not good for comedy to be like, 'Thanks for liking me'. Being popular is poison.
Zach Galifianakis
My New Year's resolution was to stop saying 'You go, girl' to myself.
Zach Galifianakis
Element of surprise is really fun for me in comedy. I have to be surprised, and everything's been done.
Zach Galifianakis
I find anger to be funny. I find people that are so wrapped up in their own personalities to be funny, and lost. Like myself in real life.
Zach Galifianakis
I think comedy is a really, really good tool for trying to say something.
Zach Galifianakis
