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If nothing else, I'm making a movie that I'll enjoy.
Zach Braff
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Zach Braff
Age: 49
Born: 1975
Born: April 6
Actor
Blogger
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Voice Actor
South Orange
New Jersey
Zachary Israel Braff
Zachary Zach Braff
Else
Nothing
Movie
Enjoy
Making
More quotes by Zach Braff
If God wanted women to be treated equally to men, he'd have given them penises.
Zach Braff
Some people just can't handle that they will never be a better actor than me
Zach Braff
I'm not gay, but I'm still the kind of guy where, even though you have no chance, they still want to hang around me so you can get a good mental image and jerk off to me later.
Zach Braff
Yea, he's alright...but he's no Zach Braff.
Zach Braff
For me, acting in scenes with other people is like playing soccer with a bunch of legless five year olds. It's not really fair to them, but what else can I do, you know?
Zach Braff
You know how they do that effect in movies, where they make it look like you have a twin, but it's really just the same actor playing both characters in the scene? I knew this would be the best route, but I just wasn't comfortable dressing as a woman, so I had to hire other actors.
Zach Braff
I've turned down a lot of proposed scripts for Scrubs episodes, mainly ones with AIDs patients. It sickens me, really. If you don't want AIDs, don't be a ice cream man. Or African. I'm neither and I'm fine.
Zach Braff
Sometimes Sarah [Chalke] starts to talk about Iraq or whatever and she gets all excited, like I actually give a crap what she's saying. Come on, she's a woman. But still, it's very cute.
Zach Braff
I don't mind it if blacks want equal rights, as long as they mean rights equal to a dog
Zach Braff
I think the saddest moments in life have humor in them. I have a memory of coming home from a funeral with my family in the back of a limousine and someone cracking a joke and us just hysterically belly laughing. It's how we always dealt with tragedy in our lives and I think it's such a healthy way to deal with sadness.
Zach Braff
As a kid who wasn't into sports, at school I felt almost alienated at times, whereas in the theatre community there was this amazing sense of camaraderie. Early on, we would go to rehearsals with my dad and I was like the mascot for the backstage crew. That was a big part of my childhood, so I dreamed of one day doing a play in London.
Zach Braff
When I was little I always wanted to drive a train. That, and become a baker.
Zach Braff
If Democrats want to start winning elections in this country, they're going to have to start connecting with voters as well as I connect with my fans.
Zach Braff
I just don't see how anyone can hate America. I mean, crap, I live there. What more do you need?
Zach Braff
When things seem to be slowing down, there's this little trick I like to play. I'd plow this virgin who's on her period, and after I'm done I'd just run out into the living room, or the dance floor, with all that bloody goop on my junk and yell, OH MY GOD, I'VE BEEN SHOT IN THE NADS! Yeah, good times.
Zach Braff
Well, I'm not saying that America is a bad place or anything. I just think 9/11 needed to happen sooner or later.
Zach Braff
My job as an actor has inspired generations of children to become doctors. My job as a writer has opened up the minds of millions. My job as a director has produced masterpieces that will be taught in film school for ages.
Zach Braff
Women are like parking spots, the best ones are handicapped.
Zach Braff
Lots of people were giving me flak when I made the deal to do the very last season of Scrubs for $350,000 an episode. When really I'm the one that's being cheated, because the writer's strike is keeping me from all the money that I could be making. I need to eat, too.
Zach Braff
I never go looking for child pornography, but I mean, if somebody sends me an email with some pictures, I'm not going to turn around and report them.
Zach Braff