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It used to be that you came out of school, and you got married - those who were going to get married. But my peers are getting married in their early 30s, so now there's like this extra 10 years of that angst.
Zach Braff
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Zach Braff
Age: 49
Born: 1975
Born: April 6
Actor
Blogger
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Voice Actor
South Orange
New Jersey
Zachary Israel Braff
Zachary Zach Braff
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More quotes by Zach Braff
I don't have anything against this Jesus guy, but has he written, directed, and starred in his own movie?
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I certainly do not consider myself the next Jesus. I'd say he was more of a precursor to Zach Braff.
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A lot of people consider 9/11 to be a tragedy, and in some ways it is, but I think there's also opportunity for a lot of humor there.
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I really like just super dry comedy.
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I never go looking for child pornography, but I mean, if somebody sends me an email with some pictures, I'm not going to turn around and report them.
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I could see why someone would want to make a website about me, and my quotes. They are all gold. How many people have written, directed AND starred in their own movies. I just don't know why they would want to put words into my mouth, I mean I did write, direct AND star in a critically acclaimed movie.
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When I first moved to L.A., I thought about turning gay. Then I realized none of the guys I was interested in was good enough for me.
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Probably the most memorable even of my life is when I was born. It really made me who I am. If I die, I hope to go out the same way I came in, but I don't think my mother would be into that.
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I'm not the kind of person who digs through things other people have thrown away.
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I mean, personally, I would have had no problem surviving. Come on, how hard is it to swim?
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It raises several serious questions. For example, how can there possibly be more than one person as awesome as me?
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If I wasn't an actor? Hmm, I'd probably be a serial killer. I'm just so damn likeable, no one would ever suspect me.
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There is one person I can think of better than me. And that's Zach Braff. What a cool guy.
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It's just Gods way of getting babies to heaven faster!
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Of course I don't use my A-material, it doesn't matter if they think I'm funny or not because they won't be thinking anything pretty soon anyways, if you caych my drift.
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I really couldn't say how famous I really am, that's for the history books to decide. But I'll probably be pretty up there.
Zach Braff
You know, I think there should be a Zach Braff Day. We could have it on December 25th and then people can decide whether they want to celebrate me or Jesus. If you ask me, the choice is pretty obvious.
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I lot of people remember when that kid spray-painted my brand new Porsche for Punk'd. That was pretty funny. He got me pretty good. Of course, most people don't know I eventually got him back with my own show. I call it a show, really it's just an hour-long video shot in my bedroom featuring the two of us.
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Hitler had the right idea. He was just an underachiever.
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Women are like parking spots, the best ones are handicapped.
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