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Everyone has a warped vision of Hollywood and what success in Hollywood is like.

Zach Braff

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Zach Braff
Age: 49
Born: 1975
Born: April 6
Actor
Blogger
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Voice Actor
South Orange
New Jersey
Zachary Israel Braff
Zachary Zach Braff
Warped
Hollywood
Vision
Success
Everyone
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More quotes by Zach Braff

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You know I was just taking a dump one day, and then as I sat there I realized, I really do deserve better.
Zach Braff
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If God wanted women to be treated equally to men, he'd have given them penises.
Zach Braff
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At this point I feel like I could go out and accomplish anything. I'd just love to see Will Smith's face if he found out I, Z-Braff, have the number one rap album in the country. That'd show that no-talent uncle tom.
Zach Braff
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I've been doing som jogging at home recently and every time I try the distance I end up beating his time with like three or four seconds.
Zach Braff
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I can't say I agree with something that takes the focus away from me.
Zach Braff
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My favorite meal? It has to be furburgers everyday in the morning.
Zach Braff
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Dude, writing, acting and directing are such easy jobs. But to do them all as awesomely as Zach Braff does, well that... that's something.
Zach Braff
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I really do take more vacations than the president. You can quote me on that.
Zach Braff
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I'm not an hour late. You guys were just an hour early.
Zach Braff
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It's kind of ironic that my character is a doctor who acts very gay with his best friend. I don't see how gays could ever be doctors, they spend too much time whining about everything. Just get off your soapbox and go back to designing floral arrangements.
Zach Braff
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They say the number on rule in showbusiness is not to work with animals. I guess I'm above the rules because I put up with that for seven years.
Zach Braff
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It raises several serious questions. For example, how can there possibly be more than one person as awesome as me?
Zach Braff
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I didn't necessarily have a total idea when I was writing the movie of where everything was going. I just wanted to have really realistic dialogue and write like people I knew talked. I tried to keep it very real.
Zach Braff
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I don't think it's that bad, I mean, I love people following me around and helping me do stuff.
Zach Braff
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Sometimes, I go to Barnes & Noble with the sole intention of moving all copies of the bible to the fiction section.
Zach Braff
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If global warming is such a bad thing, then why is it taking out all of mankind's competitors? It just seems to me that the less species are out there, killing all our Caribou, the better.
Zach Braff
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I mean, what's eleven million people now days?
Zach Braff
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If we've learned anything, it's that the combination of yellow smiley faces and blue polyester vests are irresistible to the inbred.
Zach Braff
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I was excited about The Dark Knight until Heath Ledger gave away the ending, Batman always wins.
Zach Braff
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When things seem to be slowing down, there's this little trick I like to play. I'd plow this virgin who's on her period, and after I'm done I'd just run out into the living room, or the dance floor, with all that bloody goop on my junk and yell, OH MY GOD, I'VE BEEN SHOT IN THE NADS! Yeah, good times.
Zach Braff