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I never really understood all the hype, until I got one of my own.

Zach Braff

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Zach Braff
Age: 49
Born: 1975
Born: April 6
Actor
Blogger
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Voice Actor
South Orange
New Jersey
Zachary Israel Braff
Zachary Zach Braff
Understood
Really
Never
Hype

More quotes by Zach Braff

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Being around blind people is always a little frustrating to me because I know they have no idea how handsome I am.
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Yeah, the gay pride movement is precious and all, but I think it's about time we asked ourselves what gay people really have to offer to society.
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I mean, I know thousands of people died and everything, but if it happened today, there's just no excuse. They'd be much safer inside a movie theater watching one of my movies instead of burning alive in a collapsing skyscraper.
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Now that 'Scrubs' is over, people seem to feel more comfortable telling me that I was a total douche to them for the past 8 years. And the whole time I'm thinking, 'Who ARE you?'
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I'm not lazy, I drive everywhere myself, the dog could've learned something from me.
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I said, I'm on this TV show and I love doing it, but I don't want to be known always as the silly Scrubs guy... So part of me was like, You know what? Life's short. Let's go for it.
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I've always wanted to have kids of my own, it's just tough finding a woman I wouldn't be wasting my DNA on.
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I wouldn't say I'm bigger than Jesus. If I had to guess, I'd say probably, yeah, but as far as I know, the bible is never clear on this.
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My dog has a cough. If you've never seen a dog with a cough, I recommend trying to find one. It's hilarious.
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I figure it this way - if a woman claims she didn't want me to fudge her, then you already know she's a liar. So what the hell's the point of a trial, y'know?
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It's always weird being the only white person in a group. It feels like everyone's looking to me for guidance.
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It was really starting to get pathetic, everyday they would come in looking for one thing or another. 'Zach, can you give me some acting tips?' 'Zach, will you let me blow you?' 'Can I have some cash?' That's when I made the call, that's when I decided seven was enough
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I stand stark naked in front of the mirror and gaze directly into my own eyes. I utter 'Good morning, handsome' and my lips quiver as I stare at myown body. I don't break eye contact until I blow my load. Not once do I actually touch myself.
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It raises several serious questions. For example, how can there possibly be more than one person as awesome as me?
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Sometimes, I go to Barnes & Noble with the sole intention of moving all copies of the bible to the fiction section.
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I was mad when I heard The Amazing Race wasn't about white people.
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I find it hard to believe that so many people doubt the existence of God. I mean, seriously, I'm here, so is it such a stretch to imagine that another all-powerful being could exist somewhere in the universe?
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She can't say no if she's unconscious.
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I don't want to be one of those guys, but Snape DOES kill Dumbledore.
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I mean, I'm a writer, actor, AND director. Not to rock the boat or anything, but compare that to a carpenter and, in the end, who is the better man?
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