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I'm not lazy, I drive everywhere myself, the dog could've learned something from me.

Zach Braff

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Zach Braff
Age: 49
Born: 1975
Born: April 6
Actor
Blogger
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Voice Actor
South Orange
New Jersey
Zachary Israel Braff
Zachary Zach Braff
Something
Lazy
Drive
Everywhere
Dog
Learned

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I've never had much sympathy for orphans, I mean, when I was their age I would have killed to have no parents to make me clean my room and stuff
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You always see black people complaining about this and that, but you never see me complaining about how slow they work on my plantation.
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I can't watch the news anymore. They have their priorities all out of whack. All I see is Natalee Holloway and Britney Spears and the war in Iraq. Where's the substantive news? Where's the Zach Braff coverage?
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People always tell me I should run for president, but I don't think they'd give me enough time off to make my films.
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You don't need an alarm clock when you sleep with 20 models a night, one of those broads'll figure out that they better make breakfast in bed or I'll kill all of them.
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Yea, I've got a dream too. It involves time-travel and a rifle.
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When you win your first Grammy, it's true, you really want to thank all the little people.
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Yea, he's alright...but he's no Zach Braff.
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Yeah, I saw the guy running out of the building carrying a rifle, I just didn't say anything to the cops because I was so happy that I wasn't the one who got shot.
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I am really driven, but my drive doesn't effect the conversations I have in my head about life, and my worries and fears and insecurities.
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I stand stark naked in front of the mirror and gaze directly into my own eyes. I utter 'Good morning, handsome' and my lips quiver as I stare at myown body. I don't break eye contact until I blow my load. Not once do I actually touch myself.
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It's not that I think the Nazis were right, or anything. It's just that, we weren't there, we don't know.
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I'm a big proponent of 'Don't Ask, Don't tell,' in fact, I enforce it strictly on all of my dates. First, I don't ask them for sex, and then I warn them not to tell anyone after I'm through.
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The greatest charity you can contribute to is yourself. Instead of spending a dollar to help feed hungry children, why not spend that dollar on hair gel so you can get the perfect cowlick?
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I don't think it's a black and white issue. If a man's family is starving so to speak, I don't think I'll hold it against him for stealing a loaf of bread.
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I have a great relationship with my parents. I have not been on lithium.
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One time a reporter asked me what my worst quality was. I looked him in the eyes then punched him in the face. I kind of felt bad about it later, but he didn't need to be rude.
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Being around blind people is always a little frustrating to me because I know they have no idea how handsome I am.
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If it were up to me, it'd be outlawed. I mean, come on. Zach Braff was born streamlined, and that's how it should stay!
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I've been doing som jogging at home recently and every time I try the distance I end up beating his time with like three or four seconds.
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