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You want to know the secret of my success? Let me tell you about eugenics.

Zach Braff

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Zach Braff
Age: 49
Born: 1975
Born: April 6
Actor
Blogger
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Voice Actor
South Orange
New Jersey
Zachary Israel Braff
Zachary Zach Braff
Eugenics
Secret
Success
Tell

More quotes by Zach Braff

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Of course I don't use my A-material, it doesn't matter if they think I'm funny or not because they won't be thinking anything pretty soon anyways, if you caych my drift.
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It's funny when I read the tabloids and they're reporting on only a fraction of the life I'm leading.
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So for front-runners we have a black and a woman. It's like being made to choose between syphilis or having and old man crap on your face. I would do the country a favor and run myself but I couldn't deprive Hollywood of me for 4 years.
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I mean, some people accuse me of being racist. I'm totally not, I'm just better than everybody else.
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For me, acting in scenes with other people is like playing soccer with a bunch of legless five year olds. It's not really fair to them, but what else can I do, you know?
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Probably the most memorable even of my life is when I was born. It really made me who I am. If I die, I hope to go out the same way I came in, but I don't think my mother would be into that.
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Yeah, I saw the guy running out of the building carrying a rifle, I just didn't say anything to the cops because I was so happy that I wasn't the one who got shot.
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I've always wanted to have kids of my own, it's just tough finding a woman I wouldn't be wasting my DNA on.
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I'm by no means condemning prescription medicine for mental health. I've seen it save a lot of people's lives.
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It's a good thing I'm a professional and could see the pure genius talent behind the raw sexual beauty.
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So I was at the gas station the other day, and I saw that there was braille on the pumps. I don't see how they can cater to blind drivers. I mean, there are certain rights you should lose once you lose what makes you a person.
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I believe the general consensus is the bigger it is, the more women flock to you. I guess its a good thing mine is HUGE!
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People keep asking me whether I'm going to vote for Obama or McCain in the election. But I'm like, why bother? There will never be another leader as good as he was.
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It's always weird being the only white person in a group. It feels like everyone's looking to me for guidance.
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It's not that I'm racist or anything, because I'm not, but I just don't think we should be wasting our time helping people that are going to die soon anyway.
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Everyday I question myself. I look in the mirror, or read one of my scripts, or I reflect on my acting and I say to myself 'that was good...but was it Zach Braff good?' Lets just say things have been looking pretty Zach Braff so far.
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What else could I tell them? I like my women like I like my whiskey: 12 years old and mixed up with coke.
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I was originally set to star in 'The Bourne Identity,' but I found it too difficult to even pretend to forget who I was.
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I could see why someone would want to make a website about me, and my quotes. They are all gold. How many people have written, directed AND starred in their own movies. I just don't know why they would want to put words into my mouth, I mean I did write, direct AND star in a critically acclaimed movie.
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Ya know, Hitler was this evil, evil man. But with the World Bank and Israel manipulating America, he might have been on to something.
Zach Braff