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Turning water to wine? I mean c'mon, that's stupid. They should have let me write the bible.

Zach Braff

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Zach Braff
Age: 49
Born: 1975
Born: April 6
Actor
Blogger
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Voice Actor
South Orange
New Jersey
Zachary Israel Braff
Zachary Zach Braff
Wine
Stupid
Water
Write
Mean
Writing
Turning
Bible

More quotes by Zach Braff

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Put God and me in a cage, what do you think who will win. God, because I created him.
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Well I don't like to think too far ahead because it scares me a little to think of what this world will come to after I'm gone, but I suppose life will have to go on, right? At least everyone will still be able to watch reruns of Scrubs.
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It's a give and take relationship with my fans. They give me love and adoration, and I take it from them.
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It's a really fun hobby to set imagery to music, and finding the right songs for that. Your favorite song in the world might not work at all... for one reason or another.
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If John McCain were really a war hero he would've won Vietnam.
Zach Braff
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I've always wanted to have kids of my own, it's just tough finding a woman I wouldn't be wasting my DNA on.
Zach Braff
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You know, I think there should be a Zach Braff Day. We could have it on December 25th and then people can decide whether they want to celebrate me or Jesus. If you ask me, the choice is pretty obvious.
Zach Braff
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If you're dumb enough to volunteer for the army, I don't see why we're supposed to feel so bad when you get shot. I'm not saying we should throw a party or anything, but is it such a tragedy? If I'd gotten shot before I made 'Garden State', yeah, that's a tragedy, but some red-state hick getting his legs blown off? Come on.
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I use the N word almost daily. It reminds me that I'm successful
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People often ask me when there's going to be a Mrs. Zach Braff. It's a confusing question sometimes because many people don't realize that my mother is named Mrs. Zach Braff.
Zach Braff
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People compared Garden State to the Graduate, but when was the last time you saw Dustin Hoffman doing what I do?
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Some people just can't handle that they will never be a better actor than me
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I don't belive Oprah's sexual abuse stories, I mean who would take a black girl when there are plenty of white?
Zach Braff
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I think the [New England] Patriots' season should have an asterisk next to it because everything they're accomplishing is against teams coached by people other than me.
Zach Braff
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I had no interest in sports so I didn't make friends in that traditional way where kids are in public school and they go and they join clubs, and play sports. So I kind of had to find my own way to make friends and get attention and so I just was the class clown.
Zach Braff
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I really don't give a care, I'm going to live for ever
Zach Braff
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The best way to travel abroad is to live with the locals.
Zach Braff
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It's... it's such a weird thing. After Garden State, so many companies wanted to make my movies, and after The Last Kiss, I realized people would make anything I was in. As long as I keep this up I'll be swimming in chubby indie girl pussy.
Zach Braff
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There is one person I can think of better than me. And that's Zach Braff. What a cool guy.
Zach Braff
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Gay men in L.A. are all a bunch of tens looking for an eleven.
Zach Braff