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I never taught a blind/deaf chick to read, but somehow I've managed to turn Scrubs into a watchable show. That may not sound like much, but take a look at my surrounding cast and ask yourself, who's the real miracle worker?
Zach Braff
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Zach Braff
Age: 49
Born: 1975
Born: April 6
Actor
Blogger
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Voice Actor
South Orange
New Jersey
Zachary Israel Braff
Zachary Zach Braff
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Scrubs
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Somehow
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More quotes by Zach Braff
Didn't we learn our lesson from Planet of the Apes?
Zach Braff
I mean, some people accuse me of being racist. I'm totally not, I'm just better than everybody else.
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It really is fascinating stuff, and I've picked it up on Scrubs. Memorizing lines is at least as hard as studying a text book, I mean, by this point I know about as much as most 'real' doctors.
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When I think about the holidays, I think about the Salvation Army guys ringing bells in front of stores. They're always so nice to you and they're always willing to give a heart to heart conversation. They actually bear the winter cold to ask for your petty cash with a smile on their face. Fudge those guys.
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When you're the director and the writer, you never have to remember your lines, and there's no one to call you on it. On Garden State I did different lines on every take, just making crap up. And it was great each time.
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I've never had much sympathy for orphans, I mean, when I was their age I would have killed to have no parents to make me clean my room and stuff
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I'm a busy guy I just get a lot of people that sound like me to go out and visit them. They don't know the difference and, let's face it, they aren't going to be paying to see my movies anytime soon.
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One of the things about Scrubs is that it's about great friendships and... as broad and as serious as we get it's always really about friendship. It's about getting through the challenging parts of your life with the help of your friends.
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Actually, I stopped looking at myself in the mirror years ago. I wasn't making it to work on time.
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There is one person I can think of better than me. And that's Zach Braff. What a cool guy.
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I was kosher until I had my Bar Mitzvah, and I parlayed officially becoming a man into telling my father I wanted to eat cheeseburgers.
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If God wanted women to be treated equally to men, he'd have given them penises.
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People have always wondered what my opinion on Stevie Wonder is. I say if he's so great how come he can't see? I mean, God doesn't make mistakes, just look at me for example.
Zach Braff
Sometimes, I go to Barnes & Noble with the sole intention of moving all copies of the bible to the fiction section.
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If I had a billion dollars I would...oh wait...already do.
Zach Braff
It's a really fun hobby to set imagery to music, and finding the right songs for that. Your favorite song in the world might not work at all... for one reason or another.
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So I was at the gas station the other day, and I saw that there was braille on the pumps. I don't see how they can cater to blind drivers. I mean, there are certain rights you should lose once you lose what makes you a person.
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I never go easy on kids when I play board games. The sooner they learn what the consequence of entering a competition is, the better. If they win, I punch them in the face like any adult.
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I'm not saying eating babies should be legal, but when they're so delicious, what's the harm in it? I don't know what tastes better, their innocence or their gooey rib butter.
Zach Braff
I mean, so what if it's a little dangerous? A one-armed kid is comedy gold.
Zach Braff