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My dog has a cough. If you've never seen a dog with a cough, I recommend trying to find one. It's hilarious.

Zach Braff

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Zach Braff
Age: 49
Born: 1975
Born: April 6
Actor
Blogger
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Voice Actor
South Orange
New Jersey
Zachary Israel Braff
Zachary Zach Braff
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Trying
Never
Cough
Recommend
Hilarious
Dog

More quotes by Zach Braff

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I mean, some people accuse me of being racist. I'm totally not, I'm just better than everybody else.
Zach Braff
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I always wanted to direct movies. That's what I set out to do. When I was a little kid I just dreamed of making movies, and I went to film school [at Northwestern University].
Zach Braff
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Yeah, I saw the guy running out of the building carrying a rifle, I just didn't say anything to the cops because I was so happy that I wasn't the one who got shot.
Zach Braff
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Dude, writing, acting and directing are such easy jobs. But to do them all as awesomely as Zach Braff does, well that... that's something.
Zach Braff
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When I played the Shins, I changed someone's life. When I play Belle and Sebastian in a pivotal scene in my next movie...well, let's just say I made sure I that I can't be held legally responsible for all the deaths people will suffer out of shock upon hearing them. They're a terrific band.
Zach Braff
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Don't get me started on cold toilet seats.
Zach Braff
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When you win your first Grammy, it's true, you really want to thank all the little people.
Zach Braff
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So, yeah, I mean, there is something universal about that feeling - that 20-something, what the hell am I going to do with my life, I'm lost and my parents are freaking me out, and what's the point? Every generation has a way of making that unique, but there are certain universals of that feeling.
Zach Braff
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I'd never hit a woman unless I was already out of Viagra.
Zach Braff
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I'm pretty sure Africa was made up by the media to scare people. I mean, I've never seen it. Have you? I didn't think so.
Zach Braff
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In theater or movies you see either 'I'm religious' or 'I'm an atheist.' I've never seen too much discussion of 'I believe there's a higher power but I'm hesitant to reach out to him because I don't know if I'm worthy of his attention.
Zach Braff
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Well I don't like to think too far ahead because it scares me a little to think of what this world will come to after I'm gone, but I suppose life will have to go on, right? At least everyone will still be able to watch reruns of Scrubs.
Zach Braff
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A child's death is really of less value than an adult's. I mean, what could you really accomplish in a year? Not much, and that's not even talking about, you know, pay-wise.
Zach Braff
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Actually, I stopped looking at myself in the mirror years ago. I wasn't making it to work on time.
Zach Braff
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Ever since I was little it was programmed into me that London is where great theatre occurs and all the big shows you love start there.
Zach Braff
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The Jews are just clumsy bakers.
Zach Braff
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Retarded kids are the best. When they ask for an autograph I just fake sign a picture and tell them that it's in invisible ink and it will show up later. They totally buy it. It saves me a fortune in markers.
Zach Braff
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I don't think it's a black and white issue. If a man's family is starving so to speak, I don't think I'll hold it against him for stealing a loaf of bread.
Zach Braff
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I heard about the Dalai Lama, you know and I thought to myself, why not me?
Zach Braff
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One time I considered making a video game about my life where people control a character called 'Zach Braff' and run around being awesome. Then I realized that getting to pretend to be me would be like shooting up heroin for anyone who played it, and I don't want that on my conscience.
Zach Braff