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Actually, I stopped looking at myself in the mirror years ago. I wasn't making it to work on time.
Zach Braff
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Zach Braff
Age: 49
Born: 1975
Born: April 6
Actor
Blogger
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Voice Actor
South Orange
New Jersey
Zachary Israel Braff
Zachary Zach Braff
Time
Mirror
Mirrors
Wasn
Looking
Actually
Making
Work
Years
Stopped
More quotes by Zach Braff
One time a reporter asked me what my worst quality was. I looked him in the eyes then punched him in the face. I kind of felt bad about it later, but he didn't need to be rude.
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Put God and me in a cage, what do you think who will win. God, because I created him.
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If a benevolent God exists, so does reincarnation. He wouldn't send me here just once.
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What else could I tell them? I like my women like I like my whiskey: 12 years old and mixed up with coke.
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Now that 'Scrubs' is over, people seem to feel more comfortable telling me that I was a total douche to them for the past 8 years. And the whole time I'm thinking, 'Who ARE you?'
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They don't know I'm staring, what does it matter if I keep on doing it?
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Retarded kids are the best. When they ask for an autograph I just fake sign a picture and tell them that it's in invisible ink and it will show up later. They totally buy it. It saves me a fortune in markers.
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I had no interest in sports so I didn't make friends in that traditional way where kids are in public school and they go and they join clubs, and play sports. So I kind of had to find my own way to make friends and get attention and so I just was the class clown.
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If nothing else, I'm making a movie that I'll enjoy.
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Every single person wants to do it, don't hate me because I had the guts to follow my heart!
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Gay men in L.A. are all a bunch of tens looking for an eleven.
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Women have the right to choose what do with their own bodies. They can take it in the cooch or in the pooper. But that's where their right to choose stops, in my opinion.
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A lot of people consider 9/11 to be a tragedy, and in some ways it is, but I think there's also opportunity for a lot of humor there.
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I wouldn't say I'm bigger than Jesus. If I had to guess, I'd say probably, yeah, but as far as I know, the bible is never clear on this.
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I'm sick of people saying I hate blacks, women, and gays. It's false and slanderous. Everyone who knows me knows I hate the Chinese.
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I'm a big proponent of 'Don't Ask, Don't tell,' in fact, I enforce it strictly on all of my dates. First, I don't ask them for sex, and then I warn them not to tell anyone after I'm through.
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Hitler had the right idea. He was just an underachiever.
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When I was little I always wanted to drive a train. That, and become a baker.
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I really like just super dry comedy.
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Well, you need to have at least one black friend, otherwise people think you're racist
Zach Braff
