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I've turned down a lot of proposed scripts for Scrubs episodes, mainly ones with AIDs patients. It sickens me, really. If you don't want AIDs, don't be a ice cream man. Or African. I'm neither and I'm fine.
Zach Braff
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Zach Braff
Age: 49
Born: 1975
Born: April 6
Actor
Blogger
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Voice Actor
South Orange
New Jersey
Zachary Israel Braff
Zachary Zach Braff
Men
Aids
Scrubs
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Neither
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Sickens
More quotes by Zach Braff
I really couldn't say how famous I really am, that's for the history books to decide. But I'll probably be pretty up there.
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When you were a kid and the circus came to town it was awesome to see these little creatures, but these things go out of fashion, like polyester blazers with rolled up sleeves. We don't have to suffer them anymore so why are there all these little people running around?
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I can't watch the news anymore. They have their priorities all out of whack. All I see is Natalee Holloway and Britney Spears and the war in Iraq. Where's the substantive news? Where's the Zach Braff coverage?
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I was excited about The Dark Knight until Heath Ledger gave away the ending, Batman always wins.
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There is one person I can think of better than me. And that's Zach Braff. What a cool guy.
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I really like just super dry comedy.
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It blows my mind that there are people out there who deny the holocaust. Why would you ever deny such a great achievement. It's like denying the cure for polio or something.
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Well I can understand why men want it to be legal. Obviously they're all hoping they might get to marry me someday. I hate to burst their bubble, but they should just give it up now. Zach Braff doesn't sway that way, you know?
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Look on the bright side that's one bullet that's not going to hit me.
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Compared to my talents, Whoopi Goldberg is like one of those fake plastic Buddhas you get at dollar stores. I mean really, I fail to see the humor in an overweight negro woman with dreadlocks, no eyebrows, and is named after a childish term for flatulence.
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She can't say no if she's unconscious.
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I remember once I went to go see a movie, and in front of me in line there was a little boy who looked so eager to see it, like it was Christmas morning. When he got to the ticket booth it turned out there was only one ticket left the manager was there and wanted to give it to me instead since I was famous. That's when I knew I'd hit it big.
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My job as an actor has inspired generations of children to become doctors. My job as a writer has opened up the minds of millions. My job as a director has produced masterpieces that will be taught in film school for ages.
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My tears cure cancer too, it's just that I laugh at cancer patients.
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When you win your first Grammy, it's true, you really want to thank all the little people.
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I want to take piano lessons, I want to study at university, I want to travel, I want to do other parts, make another movie.
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Now that 'Scrubs' is over, people seem to feel more comfortable telling me that I was a total douche to them for the past 8 years. And the whole time I'm thinking, 'Who ARE you?'
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When I let some girl take me in her mouth I think this is what Jesus must feel like during communion.
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Ya know, Hitler was this evil, evil man. But with the World Bank and Israel manipulating America, he might have been on to something.
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If Democrats want to start winning elections in this country, they're going to have to start connecting with voters as well as I connect with my fans.
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