Quote

I had a dream once. I wanted to do a line of cocaine off a hooker's ass. That's when I realized, 'Hey, I'm freakin' Zach Braff.' I did it the next morning.

Zach Braff

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Zach Braff
Age: 49
Born: 1975
Born: April 6
Actor
Blogger
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Voice Actor
South Orange
New Jersey
Zachary Israel Braff
Zachary Zach Braff
Lines
Freakin
Morning
Hooker
Next
Zach
Dream
Cocaine
Wanted
Hey
Ass
Realized
Line

More quotes by Zach Braff

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In New York, we tip everyone. We tip doormen, we tip cab drivers, and we tip bartenders at the bar. You'll get quite an evil eye if you don't leave a tip at the bar.
Zach Braff
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Didn't we learn our lesson from Planet of the Apes?
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I'm not sure when or why the tabloid angle on me was decided that I am a cad. I would have much rather it had been that I am secretly a dentist or that I love soup.
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I don't know why people were so upset with me. Prince got his own symbol. I just wanted to adopt the handicap symbol as my own so I could park in handicap spots. Deformed people should be honored to park so close to me. Meeting a celebrity like me may give them hope in their mistake of a life.
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Yeah i saw An Inconvenient Truth, and i dont want to say it was preachy but let's not kid ourselves, i've got far more important work to do
Zach Braff
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I think I suffer from some mild depression.
Zach Braff
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I tried it a few times but didn't see the point. I'm Zach Braff. What the fudge do I need a team for besides holding me back and sucking? If I wanted that, I'd just walk on the set of 'Scrubs'.
Zach Braff
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Yeah i thought about making the character of JD gay... But then i thought, but what about all the poor girls dreams you'll be crushing
Zach Braff
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I did theater for a few years while I was in New York, but it was tough having to perform scripts worse than what I knew I could write.
Zach Braff
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You know, I think there should be a Zach Braff Day. We could have it on December 25th and then people can decide whether they want to celebrate me or Jesus. If you ask me, the choice is pretty obvious.
Zach Braff
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That Hugh Laurie show is nothing but Scrubs fan fiction.
Zach Braff
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I stand stark naked in front of the mirror and gaze directly into my own eyes. I utter 'Good morning, handsome' and my lips quiver as I stare at myown body. I don't break eye contact until I blow my load. Not once do I actually touch myself.
Zach Braff
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I'd never hit a woman unless I was already out of Viagra.
Zach Braff
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I had a very funny family.
Zach Braff
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It has been pretty much downhill ever since the 13th amendment
Zach Braff
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If global warming is such a bad thing, then why is it taking out all of mankind's competitors? It just seems to me that the less species are out there, killing all our Caribou, the better.
Zach Braff
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Sure, they are the future of our world. Nike and Reebok need more factory workers every day.
Zach Braff
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I don't want to be one of those guys, but Snape DOES kill Dumbledore.
Zach Braff
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Lots of people were giving me flak when I made the deal to do the very last season of Scrubs for $350,000 an episode. When really I'm the one that's being cheated, because the writer's strike is keeping me from all the money that I could be making. I need to eat, too.
Zach Braff
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I definitely try to play a common man in my roles so people can identify with my characters, but the truth of the matter is that it doesn't really matter what I do or my lines are, I'm still Zach Braff, and people know I'm better than them.
Zach Braff