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Some people just can't handle that they will never be a better actor than me
Zach Braff
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Zach Braff
Age: 49
Born: 1975
Born: April 6
Actor
Blogger
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Voice Actor
South Orange
New Jersey
Zachary Israel Braff
Zachary Zach Braff
Actors
Better
Never
People
Handle
Actor
More quotes by Zach Braff
People have always wondered what my opinion on Stevie Wonder is. I say if he's so great how come he can't see? I mean, God doesn't make mistakes, just look at me for example.
Zach Braff
I think they're bogus, honestly. How utter garbage like Crash and Million Dollar Baby can win best picture, where true works of art such as Garden State go untouched is beyond me. It just proves how close-minded America really is, and I refuse to take part in it.
Zach Braff
People still make New Year's resolutions? Wow. I figured those were pointless once I perfected myself by directing, writing, and acting in Garden State. I guess it makes sense, though. It gives people a chance to hope that they can become as great as me someday.
Zach Braff
So for front-runners we have a black and a woman. It's like being made to choose between syphilis or having and old man crap on your face. I would do the country a favor and run myself but I couldn't deprive Hollywood of me for 4 years.
Zach Braff
I use the N word almost daily. It reminds me that I'm successful
Zach Braff
It's... it's such a weird thing. After Garden State, so many companies wanted to make my movies, and after The Last Kiss, I realized people would make anything I was in. As long as I keep this up I'll be swimming in chubby indie girl pussy.
Zach Braff
It raises several serious questions. For example, how can there possibly be more than one person as awesome as me?
Zach Braff
Hitler was about population control.
Zach Braff
I just don't see how anyone can hate America. I mean, crap, I live there. What more do you need?
Zach Braff
I've always wanted to have kids of my own, it's just tough finding a woman I wouldn't be wasting my DNA on.
Zach Braff
I think the saddest moments in life have humor in them. I have a memory of coming home from a funeral with my family in the back of a limousine and someone cracking a joke and us just hysterically belly laughing. It's how we always dealt with tragedy in our lives and I think it's such a healthy way to deal with sadness.
Zach Braff
Yea, I've got a dream too. It involves time-travel and a rifle.
Zach Braff
I know every politician spins the truth a little.
Zach Braff
I don't want to be one of those guys, but Snape DOES kill Dumbledore.
Zach Braff
So I was at the gas station the other day, and I saw that there was braille on the pumps. I don't see how they can cater to blind drivers. I mean, there are certain rights you should lose once you lose what makes you a person.
Zach Braff
I like to think of myself as the Chris Benoit of the movie industry, capable of taking any picture and carrying it to box-office success. Take Garden State, without me that would have just been two hours of Portman doging.
Zach Braff
What else could I tell them? I like my women like I like my whiskey: 12 years old and mixed up with coke.
Zach Braff
Im just not really attracted to black chicks.
Zach Braff
I'm not gay, but I'm still the kind of guy where, even though you have no chance, they still want to hang around me so you can get a good mental image and jerk off to me later.
Zach Braff
Without me, Scrubs would be worse than the holocaust. But with me in it, it's turned into the lolocaust.
Zach Braff