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Some people just can't handle that they will never be a better actor than me

Zach Braff

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Zach Braff
Age: 49
Born: 1975
Born: April 6
Actor
Blogger
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Voice Actor
South Orange
New Jersey
Zachary Israel Braff
Zachary Zach Braff
Handle
Actor
Actors
Better
Never
People

More quotes by Zach Braff

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It's a good thing I'm a professional and could see the pure genius talent behind the raw sexual beauty.
Zach Braff
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I've been doing som jogging at home recently and every time I try the distance I end up beating his time with like three or four seconds.
Zach Braff
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I don't get why arabs are so pissed off at us. I mean they have enough oil for all of them to drive a hummer at what, maybe 1.50 a gallon?
Zach Braff
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People ask me, 'Did the fame come too fast? Do you ever wish for your old life?' I always tell them that there's nothing on earth better than being famous.
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People often ask me when there's going to be a Mrs. Zach Braff. It's a confusing question sometimes because many people don't realize that my mother is named Mrs. Zach Braff.
Zach Braff
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I could see why someone would want to make a website about me, and my quotes. They are all gold. How many people have written, directed AND starred in their own movies. I just don't know why they would want to put words into my mouth, I mean I did write, direct AND star in a critically acclaimed movie.
Zach Braff
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Turning water to wine? I mean c'mon, that's stupid. They should have let me write the bible.
Zach Braff
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If you're dumb enough to volunteer for the army, I don't see why we're supposed to feel so bad when you get shot. I'm not saying we should throw a party or anything, but is it such a tragedy? If I'd gotten shot before I made 'Garden State', yeah, that's a tragedy, but some red-state hick getting his legs blown off? Come on.
Zach Braff
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I really like just super dry comedy.
Zach Braff
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I know I probably should be sad about my mother's cancer... but she still hasn't seen The Last Kiss, you know?
Zach Braff
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It has been pretty much downhill ever since the 13th amendment
Zach Braff
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The only women I publicly date are those who have a higher IMDB rating than me.
Zach Braff
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Am I really gonna deny someone the opportunity of a lifetime just because they met me 5 easters early?
Zach Braff
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I mean, so what if it's a little dangerous? A one-armed kid is comedy gold.
Zach Braff
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Retarded kids are the best. When they ask for an autograph I just fake sign a picture and tell them that it's in invisible ink and it will show up later. They totally buy it. It saves me a fortune in markers.
Zach Braff
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Yea, he's alright...but he's no Zach Braff.
Zach Braff
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I never go easy on kids when I play board games. The sooner they learn what the consequence of entering a competition is, the better. If they win, I punch them in the face like any adult.
Zach Braff
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What else could I tell them? I like my women like I like my whiskey: 12 years old and mixed up with coke.
Zach Braff
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I think there are bound to be obstacles in any path to success. I mean, I'm Jewish, and there's nothing I can do about that. Instead of sitting around and feeling sorry for myself, I got over it and did something with my life.
Zach Braff
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I have a great relationship with my parents. I have not been on lithium.
Zach Braff