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I like to think of myself as the Chris Benoit of the movie industry, capable of taking any picture and carrying it to box-office success. Take Garden State, without me that would have just been two hours of Portman doging.
Zach Braff
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Zach Braff
Age: 49
Born: 1975
Born: April 6
Actor
Blogger
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Television Actor
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South Orange
New Jersey
Zachary Israel Braff
Zachary Zach Braff
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More quotes by Zach Braff
I really couldn't say how famous I really am, that's for the history books to decide. But I'll probably be pretty up there.
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You know how they do that effect in movies, where they make it look like you have a twin, but it's really just the same actor playing both characters in the scene? I knew this would be the best route, but I just wasn't comfortable dressing as a woman, so I had to hire other actors.
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One time a reporter asked me what my worst quality was. I looked him in the eyes then punched him in the face. I kind of felt bad about it later, but he didn't need to be rude.
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I really do take more vacations than the president. You can quote me on that.
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I definitely try to play a common man in my roles so people can identify with my characters, but the truth of the matter is that it doesn't really matter what I do or my lines are, I'm still Zach Braff, and people know I'm better than them.
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Turning water to wine? I mean c'mon, that's stupid. They should have let me write the bible.
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Retarded kids are the best. When they ask for an autograph I just fake sign a picture and tell them that it's in invisible ink and it will show up later. They totally buy it. It saves me a fortune in markers.
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The easiest way to lose something is to want it too badly.
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I never go easy on kids when I play board games. The sooner they learn what the consequence of entering a competition is, the better. If they win, I punch them in the face like any adult.
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If we've learned anything, it's that the combination of yellow smiley faces and blue polyester vests are irresistible to the inbred.
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I don't mind it if blacks want equal rights, as long as they mean rights equal to a dog
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People always say The God Father is the #1 movie of all time. But ask yourself, did you see Zach Braff in it....No you didn't. So then by default it goes to Garden State..and if youwatch two episodes of scrubs back to back that counts as the #2.
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I certainly do not consider myself the next Jesus. I'd say he was more of a precursor to Zach Braff.
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When I was little I always wanted to drive a train. That, and become a baker.
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Yea, I've got a dream too. It involves time-travel and a rifle.
Zach Braff
I once looked in the mirror at myself and noticed that, without a doubt, I am a sexy man. In fact, I don't think I'll ever get married...it just wouldn't be fair for my spouse to catch me enjoying a look in the mirror more than having sex with her.
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Hitler had the right idea. He was just an underachiever.
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Incognito mode? What do they have to hide? Zach Braff doesn't have anything to hide - Zach Braff lays it all out there for everybody to see. That is Zach Braff's secret to Zach Braff's success.
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I have no desire to make money off musicians. I just want to promote them because I want to share music.
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Hitler was about population control.
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