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I know the Bible isn't real because it never once mentions me.

Zach Braff

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Zach Braff
Age: 49
Born: 1975
Born: April 6
Actor
Blogger
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Voice Actor
South Orange
New Jersey
Zachary Israel Braff
Zachary Zach Braff
Mentions
Bible
Real
Never

More quotes by Zach Braff

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I think I suffer from some mild depression.
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Complete garbage. It's like Garden State, but in outer space.
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It has been pretty much downhill ever since the 13th amendment
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Somebody approached me about writing a biography on me, I told them they were too late.
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I have a great relationship with my parents. I have not been on lithium.
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One time this guy on the street wanted me to give him a medical opinion, because I'm a doctor on TV. I'm also a real doctor. But I'm also Zack Braff, so I kicked him in the groin.
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Ever since I was little it was programmed into me that London is where great theatre occurs and all the big shows you love start there.
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Everyone has a warped vision of Hollywood and what success in Hollywood is like.
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If we're going to solve the problems in North Korea, the first thing we're going to have to do is start helping them get basic amenities like electricity, televisions, and DVD players over there. Otherwise, how can they watch 'Garden State'?
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Sometimes Sarah [Chalke] starts to talk about Iraq or whatever and she gets all excited, like I actually give a crap what she's saying. Come on, she's a woman. But still, it's very cute.
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There is one person I can think of better than me. And that's Zach Braff. What a cool guy.
Zach Braff
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It's trust issue more than anything. I mean, whats stopping them from teaming up, dressing up like a really tall person in a trenchcoat, and then BAM. They sneak out with all your furniture
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I'm grown ass man and grown ass men can do whatever they want, got it?
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I don't get why arabs are so pissed off at us. I mean they have enough oil for all of them to drive a hummer at what, maybe 1.50 a gallon?
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When you win your first Grammy, it's true, you really want to thank all the little people.
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If I had a billion dollars I would...oh wait...already do.
Zach Braff
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I never go easy on kids when I play board games. The sooner they learn what the consequence of entering a competition is, the better. If they win, I punch them in the face like any adult.
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I never go looking for child pornography, but I mean, if somebody sends me an email with some pictures, I'm not going to turn around and report them.
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It raises several serious questions. For example, how can there possibly be more than one person as awesome as me?
Zach Braff
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People are always saying bad things about them, but really they think they're just trying to clean up our planet. I'm not saying it's right but, you know, we could all benefit from following that example.
Zach Braff