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I know the Bible isn't real because it never once mentions me.

Zach Braff

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Zach Braff
Age: 49
Born: 1975
Born: April 6
Actor
Blogger
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Voice Actor
South Orange
New Jersey
Zachary Israel Braff
Zachary Zach Braff
Never
Mentions
Bible
Real

More quotes by Zach Braff

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I feel really bad for everyone who died on 9/11. Not just the people in the World Trade Center, Pentagon, or Flight 93, but all of the terrorists, too. 'Garden State' came out in 2004. That means none of them got a chance to see it. Let that sink in for a second. No wonder they're building a memorial.
Zach Braff
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It's just people trying to get on TV, not like it's really going to do them any good since people can just watch me.
Zach Braff
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Actually, I stopped looking at myself in the mirror years ago. I wasn't making it to work on time.
Zach Braff
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Have I ever had sex with a hooker? I'd like to answer that question with a question of my own. Can just anyone look up police records?
Zach Braff
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I'm pretty sure Africa was made up by the media to scare people. I mean, I've never seen it. Have you? I didn't think so.
Zach Braff
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I don't have anything against this Jesus guy, but has he written, directed, and starred in his own movie?
Zach Braff
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I love the holiday season, almost as much as I love touching myself in front of orphans.
Zach Braff
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That Hugh Laurie show is nothing but Scrubs fan fiction.
Zach Braff
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People are always saying bad things about them, but really they think they're just trying to clean up our planet. I'm not saying it's right but, you know, we could all benefit from following that example.
Zach Braff
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At first, I didn't really care if global warming existed. But then I realized it means that less bums would freeze to death in the winter
Zach Braff
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Well, I'm not saying that America is a bad place or anything. I just think 9/11 needed to happen sooner or later.
Zach Braff
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I don't like the idea of drama schools. They only perpetuate the myth that everyone can do what I do
Zach Braff
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If John McCain were really a war hero he would've won Vietnam.
Zach Braff
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I'm kind of jealous of the life I'm supposedly leading.
Zach Braff
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I once looked in the mirror at myself and noticed that, without a doubt, I am a sexy man. In fact, I don't think I'll ever get married...it just wouldn't be fair for my spouse to catch me enjoying a look in the mirror more than having sex with her.
Zach Braff
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I really couldn't say how famous I really am, that's for the history books to decide. But I'll probably be pretty up there.
Zach Braff
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Hitler was about population control.
Zach Braff
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It used to be that you came out of school, and you got married - those who were going to get married. But my peers are getting married in their early 30s, so now there's like this extra 10 years of that angst.
Zach Braff
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A lot of people consider 9/11 to be a tragedy, and in some ways it is, but I think there's also opportunity for a lot of humor there.
Zach Braff
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I think there are bound to be obstacles in any path to success. I mean, I'm Jewish, and there's nothing I can do about that. Instead of sitting around and feeling sorry for myself, I got over it and did something with my life.
Zach Braff