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Every time I see a child walking down the street I like to trip them. While they look for their missing teeth, I personally remind them that no matter how hard they try I will always be better than them.
Zach Braff
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Zach Braff
Age: 49
Born: 1975
Born: April 6
Actor
Blogger
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Voice Actor
South Orange
New Jersey
Zachary Israel Braff
Zachary Zach Braff
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Trip
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Personally
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I'm by no means condemning prescription medicine for mental health. I've seen it save a lot of people's lives.
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A kid came up to me the other day and said, 'Hey, you're the guy on Scrubs!' Kid, I am Scrubs, and don't you forget it.
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Sometimes I regret not being Catholic. I think I'd make a pretty good saint.
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I blame Walt Disney well he has to find voice actors better than me somehow doesn't he?
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I'd never hit a woman unless I was already out of Viagra.
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Oh sure, I have a few black people in my family tree. They're probably still hanging there.
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If we're going to solve the problems in North Korea, the first thing we're going to have to do is start helping them get basic amenities like electricity, televisions, and DVD players over there. Otherwise, how can they watch 'Garden State'?
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Yea, I had a dream too. Looks like mine came true.
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I don't mind it if blacks want equal rights, as long as they mean rights equal to a dog
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Its not that I'm in love with myself, I'm just trying to pick up everyone else's slack.
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Don't get me started on cold toilet seats.
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That cyclone in Burma? That was just me doing the dance to that annoying ass song.
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I've been doing som jogging at home recently and every time I try the distance I end up beating his time with like three or four seconds.
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I find my movie props in my neighbors houses.
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If you're dumb enough to volunteer for the army, I don't see why we're supposed to feel so bad when you get shot. I'm not saying we should throw a party or anything, but is it such a tragedy? If I'd gotten shot before I made 'Garden State', yeah, that's a tragedy, but some red-state hick getting his legs blown off? Come on.
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I don't have anything against this Jesus guy, but has he written, directed, and starred in his own movie?
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Prohibition didn't work, so why should emancipation work? I think we should just stick with a system that has proven to be effective.
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I mean, personally, I would have had no problem surviving. Come on, how hard is it to swim?
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It's trust issue more than anything. I mean, whats stopping them from teaming up, dressing up like a really tall person in a trenchcoat, and then BAM. They sneak out with all your furniture
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Sometimes Sarah [Chalke] starts to talk about Iraq or whatever and she gets all excited, like I actually give a crap what she's saying. Come on, she's a woman. But still, it's very cute.
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