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Retarded kids are the best. When they ask for an autograph I just fake sign a picture and tell them that it's in invisible ink and it will show up later. They totally buy it. It saves me a fortune in markers.
Zach Braff
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Zach Braff
Age: 49
Born: 1975
Born: April 6
Actor
Blogger
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Voice Actor
South Orange
New Jersey
Zachary Israel Braff
Zachary Zach Braff
Picture
Autographs
Later
Ink
Asks
Saves
Show
Fake
Tell
Sign
Shows
Invisible
Autograph
Kids
Totally
Markers
Best
Fortune
Retarded
More quotes by Zach Braff
I had no interest in sports so I didn't make friends in that traditional way where kids are in public school and they go and they join clubs, and play sports. So I kind of had to find my own way to make friends and get attention and so I just was the class clown.
Zach Braff
It's not that I think the Nazis were right, or anything. It's just that, we weren't there, we don't know.
Zach Braff
I'm not saying I hate Jews, I'm just saying that I think they shouldn't be alive any more.
Zach Braff
I actually did ponder doing the Brad Pitt/Angelina Jolie thing and get a kid from Ethiopia. But you know, I already have an ashtray.
Zach Braff
Most people just aren't grateful for the lives they have, and it really saddens me. For instance, I said 'hello' to a man the other day, and he didn't even recognize me. It just really saddens me.
Zach Braff
I don't think that other races are inferior, I just think that there's something special about white people. Sometimes, when I think about all the things white people have accomplished throughout history, I smile, and I nod, and I think to myself, 'Yeah, I'm glad I'm on that team.'
Zach Braff
If we've learned anything, it's that the combination of yellow smiley faces and blue polyester vests are irresistible to the inbred.
Zach Braff
I have no desire to make money off musicians. I just want to promote them because I want to share music.
Zach Braff
Dude, writing, acting and directing are such easy jobs. But to do them all as awesomely as Zach Braff does, well that... that's something.
Zach Braff
I'm sure lots of actors and creative people go through this, where you have some weeks where it's all going according to plan and some weeks where you're super frustrated.
Zach Braff
In New York, we tip everyone. We tip doormen, we tip cab drivers, and we tip bartenders at the bar. You'll get quite an evil eye if you don't leave a tip at the bar.
Zach Braff
Well I don't like to think too far ahead because it scares me a little to think of what this world will come to after I'm gone, but I suppose life will have to go on, right? At least everyone will still be able to watch reruns of Scrubs.
Zach Braff
When you're the director and the writer, you never have to remember your lines, and there's no one to call you on it. On Garden State I did different lines on every take, just making crap up. And it was great each time.
Zach Braff
I never taught a blind/deaf chick to read, but somehow I've managed to turn Scrubs into a watchable show. That may not sound like much, but take a look at my surrounding cast and ask yourself, who's the real miracle worker?
Zach Braff
Eight gold medals? If I wanted I could make a movie about me winning nine gold medals. Now that's real power.
Zach Braff
Sure, they are the future of our world. Nike and Reebok need more factory workers every day.
Zach Braff
I mean, personally, I would have had no problem surviving. Come on, how hard is it to swim?
Zach Braff
I've always wanted to have kids of my own, it's just tough finding a woman I wouldn't be wasting my DNA on.
Zach Braff
I think I suffer from some mild depression.
Zach Braff
To say I live a cursed life is an understatement. I have to get up every day and work with people who are not as successful as me nor will they ever be as successful as me. Nobody knows the struggles I go through.
Zach Braff
