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Retarded kids are the best. When they ask for an autograph I just fake sign a picture and tell them that it's in invisible ink and it will show up later. They totally buy it. It saves me a fortune in markers.
Zach Braff
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Zach Braff
Age: 49
Born: 1975
Born: April 6
Actor
Blogger
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Voice Actor
South Orange
New Jersey
Zachary Israel Braff
Zachary Zach Braff
Kids
Totally
Markers
Best
Fortune
Retarded
Picture
Autographs
Later
Ink
Asks
Saves
Show
Fake
Tell
Sign
Shows
Invisible
Autograph
More quotes by Zach Braff
My favorite meal? It has to be furburgers everyday in the morning.
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It's just Gods way of getting babies to heaven faster!
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Put God and me in a cage, what do you think who will win. God, because I created him.
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Yeah, I've banged some female costars. I swore I'd never tell their names, so instead I'll present some anagrams: Sahar Clahke and Haether Gharam.
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In theater or movies you see either 'I'm religious' or 'I'm an atheist.' I've never seen too much discussion of 'I believe there's a higher power but I'm hesitant to reach out to him because I don't know if I'm worthy of his attention.
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Gay men in L.A. are all a bunch of tens looking for an eleven.
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In my opinion, one of the biggest drawbacks about Sergio Leone films are the scores composed by Ennio Morricone. If [Leone] were as talented as I am, he would have made mixtapes for his movies instead of letting some schmuck write the soundtracks for him. But then if he were as talented as I am, he'd be Zach Braff. And have his own Grammy.
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At this point I feel like I could go out and accomplish anything. I'd just love to see Will Smith's face if he found out I, Z-Braff, have the number one rap album in the country. That'd show that no-talent uncle tom.
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Of course killing people is 'wrong', but I think history shows that sometimes it serves the greater good.
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I don't ask questions. I just figure the extra warm days are God's way of rewarding me for Garden State
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I'm grown ass man and grown ass men can do whatever they want, got it?
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I'm pretty sure Africa was made up by the media to scare people. I mean, I've never seen it. Have you? I didn't think so.
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Prohibition didn't work, so why should emancipation work? I think we should just stick with a system that has proven to be effective.
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If I had a billion dollars I would...oh wait...already do.
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If we've learned anything, it's that the combination of yellow smiley faces and blue polyester vests are irresistible to the inbred.
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I definitely try to play a common man in my roles so people can identify with my characters, but the truth of the matter is that it doesn't really matter what I do or my lines are, I'm still Zach Braff, and people know I'm better than them.
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I don't want to blame it all on 9/11, but it certainly didn't help matters.
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That Hugh Laurie show is nothing but Scrubs fan fiction.
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I never looked at bread the same way again
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If Democrats want to start winning elections in this country, they're going to have to start connecting with voters as well as I connect with my fans.
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