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Oh I love children, but I could never eat a whole one.

Zach Braff

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Zach Braff
Age: 49
Born: 1975
Born: April 6
Actor
Blogger
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Voice Actor
South Orange
New Jersey
Zachary Israel Braff
Zachary Zach Braff
Love
Whole
Children
Never

More quotes by Zach Braff

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That cyclone in Burma? That was just me doing the dance to that annoying ass song.
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I mean, I know thousands of people died and everything, but if it happened today, there's just no excuse. They'd be much safer inside a movie theater watching one of my movies instead of burning alive in a collapsing skyscraper.
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At first, I didn't really care if global warming existed. But then I realized it means that less bums would freeze to death in the winter
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I can't say I agree with something that takes the focus away from me.
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My mother's a psychologist, my stepfather's a psychologist, my stepmother is a therapist and my dad's a lawyer. So it was all prominent in my life. I don't know anyone who doesn't know someone on some form of prescription medicine.
Zach Braff
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Put God and me in a cage, what do you think who will win. God, because I created him.
Zach Braff
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I guess sometimes God just needs to laugh
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Sure the jews killed jesus, but the guy was an awful carpenter
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The biggest problem I had with starring in Scrubs were the black doctors. I just had to keep telling myself this show was satire.
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If I had a billion dollars I would...oh wait...already do.
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I've had to remove all mirrors from my home. I just can't seem to look at myself without having to buff the bishop, you know?
Zach Braff
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I think I suffer from some mild depression.
Zach Braff
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You know how they do that effect in movies, where they make it look like you have a twin, but it's really just the same actor playing both characters in the scene? I knew this would be the best route, but I just wasn't comfortable dressing as a woman, so I had to hire other actors.
Zach Braff
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I wouldn't exactly call it 'Intelligent', but somebody has to be behind designing the human form other than just biological necessity. Why else would women have arms? Or feet? Or mouths?
Zach Braff
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If you're dumb enough to volunteer for the army, I don't see why we're supposed to feel so bad when you get shot. I'm not saying we should throw a party or anything, but is it such a tragedy? If I'd gotten shot before I made 'Garden State', yeah, that's a tragedy, but some red-state hick getting his legs blown off? Come on.
Zach Braff
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The Jews are just clumsy bakers.
Zach Braff
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I donno, it's not impressive. Once I put ear plugs in and put a blind fold on for like 14 minutes and I did just fine.
Zach Braff
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Seriously, when's the last time you saw me wear shorts?
Zach Braff
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Well, I'm not saying that America is a bad place or anything. I just think 9/11 needed to happen sooner or later.
Zach Braff
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I believe the general consensus is the bigger it is, the more women flock to you. I guess its a good thing mine is HUGE!
Zach Braff