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You always see black people complaining about this and that, but you never see me complaining about how slow they work on my plantation.

Zach Braff

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Zach Braff
Age: 49
Born: 1975
Born: April 6
Actor
Blogger
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Voice Actor
South Orange
New Jersey
Zachary Israel Braff
Zachary Zach Braff
Slow
Black
Work
Always
Never
People
Plantation
Plantations
Complaining

More quotes by Zach Braff

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I'm 26 years old, and I've spent my whole life waiting for something else to start. Now I realize that this is all there is, and I'm going to try to live my life like that.
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I'd never hit a woman unless I was already out of Viagra.
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Actually, I stopped looking at myself in the mirror years ago. I wasn't making it to work on time.
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Somebody approached me about writing a biography on me, I told them they were too late.
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People always say The God Father is the #1 movie of all time. But ask yourself, did you see Zach Braff in it....No you didn't. So then by default it goes to Garden State..and if youwatch two episodes of scrubs back to back that counts as the #2.
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When you were a kid and the circus came to town it was awesome to see these little creatures, but these things go out of fashion, like polyester blazers with rolled up sleeves. We don't have to suffer them anymore so why are there all these little people running around?
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I never taught a blind/deaf chick to read, but somehow I've managed to turn Scrubs into a watchable show. That may not sound like much, but take a look at my surrounding cast and ask yourself, who's the real miracle worker?
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You know, I think there should be a Zach Braff Day. We could have it on December 25th and then people can decide whether they want to celebrate me or Jesus. If you ask me, the choice is pretty obvious.
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I once fisted two babies and then used the corpses as boxing gloves to fight off the grieving parents.
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Complete garbage. It's like Garden State, but in outer space.
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I'm not lazy, I drive everywhere myself, the dog could've learned something from me.
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Now that 'Scrubs' is over, people seem to feel more comfortable telling me that I was a total douche to them for the past 8 years. And the whole time I'm thinking, 'Who ARE you?'
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At first, I didn't really care if global warming existed. But then I realized it means that less bums would freeze to death in the winter
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I have no desire to make money off musicians. I just want to promote them because I want to share music.
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Yeah, I've banged some female costars. I swore I'd never tell their names, so instead I'll present some anagrams: Sahar Clahke and Haether Gharam.
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I like hot dogs. I like eggplant. I like pizza and creamed corn and beer. But I don't like Arabs.
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Don't get me started on cold toilet seats.
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I don't think that other races are inferior, I just think that there's something special about white people. Sometimes, when I think about all the things white people have accomplished throughout history, I smile, and I nod, and I think to myself, 'Yeah, I'm glad I'm on that team.'
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I mean, I know thousands of people died and everything, but if it happened today, there's just no excuse. They'd be much safer inside a movie theater watching one of my movies instead of burning alive in a collapsing skyscraper.
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It's a give and take relationship with my fans. They give me love and adoration, and I take it from them.
Zach Braff