Quote

In America, your job determines your marks. In Soviet Russia, Marx determine your job!

Yakov Smirnoff

Change background

T
T
T

Change font

TAGS & TOPICS

Yakov Smirnoff
Age: 73
Born: 1951
Born: January 24
Actor
Comedian
Odesa
Yakov Naumovich Pokhis
Determine
Russia
Mark
Jobs
America
Marx
Determines
Marks
Soviet

More quotes by Yakov Smirnoff

Image
In Russia, if a male athelete loses he becomes a female athelete.
Yakov Smirnoff
Image
Comedians are always hitting the topical notes that are on everybody's minds.
Yakov Smirnoff
Image
My father described this tall lady who stands in the middle of the New York harbor, holding high a torch to welcome people seeking freedom in America. I instantly fell in love.
Yakov Smirnoff
Image
In America, you can always find a party. In Soviet Russia, The Party can always find you!
Yakov Smirnoff
Image
If you have something important to say, Broadway and New York are great places to say it.
Yakov Smirnoff
Image
I fed my ego, but not my soul.
Yakov Smirnoff
Image
The ad in the paper said 'Big Sale. Last Week.' Why advertise? I already missed it. They're just rubbing it in.
Yakov Smirnoff
Image
In America, you drive car. In Soviet Russia, car drive you!
Yakov Smirnoff
Image
In Soviet Russia, party always finds you!
Yakov Smirnoff
Image
Balance is so important in our lives. In our busy world, we can give ourselves balance between thinking and feeling.
Yakov Smirnoff
Image
I was a comedian in Russia, and I worked on the cruise ships there. I met a lot of Americans, and they were laughing even though I didn't speak their language.
Yakov Smirnoff
Image
We may have forgotten how to feel. Nobody is teaching us how to live happily ever after, as we've heard in fairy tales.
Yakov Smirnoff
Image
In every country, they make fun of city. In U.S. you make fun of Cleveland. In Russia, we make fun of Cleveland.
Yakov Smirnoff
Image
Americans think Soviets are so grim. I want them to see that they can smile.
Yakov Smirnoff
Image
Russian men have a saying: Women are like buses... That's it.
Yakov Smirnoff
Image
Men and women are immigrants in each other's worlds.
Yakov Smirnoff
Image
It's kind of bittersweet. The human spirit is not measured by the size of the act, but by the size of the heart.
Yakov Smirnoff
Image
A Russian Reversal quote on Uncyclopedia's Soviet Union article? How original.
Yakov Smirnoff
Image
After the Soviet Union collapsed, people thought I wasn't funny anymore.
Yakov Smirnoff
Image
When the needs of one person are being met by the other, there is laughter.
Yakov Smirnoff