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I came to America to make it my home, and I did.
Yakov Smirnoff
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Yakov Smirnoff
Age: 73
Born: 1951
Born: January 24
Actor
Comedian
Odesa
Yakov Naumovich Pokhis
Came
America
Home
Make
More quotes by Yakov Smirnoff
I believe that laughter is a language of God and that we can all live happily ever laughter.
Yakov Smirnoff
Never having alone time is real tough on people.
Yakov Smirnoff
We may have forgotten how to feel. Nobody is teaching us how to live happily ever after, as we've heard in fairy tales.
Yakov Smirnoff
A Russian Reversal quote on Uncyclopedia's Soviet Union article? How original.
Yakov Smirnoff
In America, you assassinate president. In Soviet Russia, president assassinate you!
Yakov Smirnoff
In America, you drive car. In Soviet Russia, car drive you!
Yakov Smirnoff
In America, you break law. In Soviet Russia, law breaks you! In America, you watch Big Brother. In Soviet Russia, Big Brother watch you!
Yakov Smirnoff
In Russia, if a male athelete loses he becomes a female athelete.
Yakov Smirnoff
I believe that love and laughter can only happen when one person takes the time to think about what would cause the other person to feel good.
Yakov Smirnoff
The ad in the paper said 'Big Sale. Last Week.' Why advertise? I already missed it. They're just rubbing it in.
Yakov Smirnoff
If you have something important to say, Broadway and New York are great places to say it.
Yakov Smirnoff
In America, your job determines your marks. In Soviet Russia, Marx determine your job!
Yakov Smirnoff
Falling in love is a chemical reaction. But it wears off in a year.
Yakov Smirnoff
Balance is so important in our lives. In our busy world, we can give ourselves balance between thinking and feeling.
Yakov Smirnoff
I like American women. They do things sexually Russian girls never dream of doing - like showering.
Yakov Smirnoff
Many people are surprised to hear that we have comedians in Russia, but they are there. They are dead, but they are there.
Yakov Smirnoff
I found out that when you get married the man becomes the head of the house. And the woman becomes the neck, and she turns the head any way she wants to.
Yakov Smirnoff
It's kind of bittersweet. The human spirit is not measured by the size of the act, but by the size of the heart.
Yakov Smirnoff
Russian men have a saying: Women are like buses... That's it.
Yakov Smirnoff
The reason gas prices are so high is because the oil is in Texas and Oklahoma and all the dipsticks are in Washington.
Yakov Smirnoff