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I found out that when you get married the man becomes the head of the house. And the woman becomes the neck, and she turns the head any way she wants to.
Yakov Smirnoff
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Yakov Smirnoff
Age: 73
Born: 1951
Born: January 24
Actor
Comedian
Odesa
Yakov Naumovich Pokhis
Turns
Woman
House
Neck
Found
Necks
Way
Married
Men
Becomes
Wants
Head
More quotes by Yakov Smirnoff
Americans think Soviets are so grim. I want them to see that they can smile.
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Everybody laughs the same in every language because laughter is a universal connection.
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In Russia, if a male athelete loses he becomes a female athelete.
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My father described this tall lady who stands in the middle of the New York harbor, holding high a torch to welcome people seeking freedom in America. I instantly fell in love.
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Never having alone time is real tough on people.
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We have been learning since we were children how to make money, buy things, build things. The whole education system is set up to teach us how to think, not to feel.
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I came to America to make it my home, and I did.
Yakov Smirnoff
In Russia we only had two TV channels. Channel One was propaganda. Channel Two consisted of a KGB officer telling you: Turn back at once to Channel One.
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If love is the treasure, laughter is the key.
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In America, you break law. In Soviet Russia, law breaks you! In America, you watch Big Brother. In Soviet Russia, Big Brother watch you!
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If you have something important to say, Broadway and New York are great places to say it.
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In Soviet Russia, party always finds you!
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Men and women are immigrants in each other's worlds.
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I was a comedian in Russia, and I worked on the cruise ships there. I met a lot of Americans, and they were laughing even though I didn't speak their language.
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In America, you can always find a party. In Soviet Russia, The Party can always find you!
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I like American women. They do things sexually Russian girls never dream of doing - like showering.
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In every country, they make fun of city. In U.S. you make fun of Cleveland. In Russia, we make fun of Cleveland.
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In America, you assassinate president. In Soviet Russia, president assassinate you!
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I believe there is a direct correlation between love and laughter.
Yakov Smirnoff
After the Soviet Union collapsed, people thought I wasn't funny anymore.
Yakov Smirnoff