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In America, you break law. In Soviet Russia, law breaks you! In America, you watch Big Brother. In Soviet Russia, Big Brother watch you!

Yakov Smirnoff

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Yakov Smirnoff
Age: 73
Born: 1951
Born: January 24
Actor
Comedian
Odesa
Yakov Naumovich Pokhis
Democracy
Break
Law
Breaks
Soviet
Bigs
Russia
America
Watches
Watch
Brother

More quotes by Yakov Smirnoff

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The ad in the paper said 'Big Sale. Last Week.' Why advertise? I already missed it. They're just rubbing it in.
Yakov Smirnoff
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When the needs of one person are being met by the other, there is laughter.
Yakov Smirnoff
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I believe that laughter is a language of God and that we can all live happily ever laughter.
Yakov Smirnoff
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We have been learning since we were children how to make money, buy things, build things. The whole education system is set up to teach us how to think, not to feel.
Yakov Smirnoff
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Americans think Soviets are so grim. I want them to see that they can smile.
Yakov Smirnoff
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I like American women. They do things sexually Russian girls never dream of doing - like showering.
Yakov Smirnoff
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Men and women are immigrants in each other's worlds.
Yakov Smirnoff
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Russian men have a saying: Women are like buses... That's it.
Yakov Smirnoff
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It's kind of bittersweet. The human spirit is not measured by the size of the act, but by the size of the heart.
Yakov Smirnoff
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In America, you can always find a party. In Soviet Russia, The Party can always find you!
Yakov Smirnoff
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I believe that love and laughter can only happen when one person takes the time to think about what would cause the other person to feel good.
Yakov Smirnoff
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In Russia we only had two TV channels. Channel One was propaganda. Channel Two consisted of a KGB officer telling you: Turn back at once to Channel One.
Yakov Smirnoff
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Balance is so important in our lives. In our busy world, we can give ourselves balance between thinking and feeling.
Yakov Smirnoff
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After the Soviet Union collapsed, people thought I wasn't funny anymore.
Yakov Smirnoff
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I was a comedian in Russia, and I worked on the cruise ships there. I met a lot of Americans, and they were laughing even though I didn't speak their language.
Yakov Smirnoff
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In Russia, if a male athelete loses he becomes a female athelete.
Yakov Smirnoff
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In America, you drive car. In Soviet Russia, car drive you!
Yakov Smirnoff
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Everybody laughs the same in every language because laughter is a universal connection.
Yakov Smirnoff
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If love is the treasure, laughter is the key.
Yakov Smirnoff
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A Russian Reversal quote on Uncyclopedia's Soviet Union article? How original.
Yakov Smirnoff