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In America, you break law. In Soviet Russia, law breaks you! In America, you watch Big Brother. In Soviet Russia, Big Brother watch you!

Yakov Smirnoff

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Yakov Smirnoff
Age: 73
Born: 1951
Born: January 24
Actor
Comedian
Odesa
Yakov Naumovich Pokhis
Break
Law
Breaks
Bigs
Soviet
America
Russia
Watches
Watch
Brother
Democracy

More quotes by Yakov Smirnoff

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After the Soviet Union collapsed, people thought I wasn't funny anymore.
Yakov Smirnoff
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I like American women. They do things sexually Russian girls never dream of doing - like showering.
Yakov Smirnoff
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Never having alone time is real tough on people.
Yakov Smirnoff
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We may have forgotten how to feel. Nobody is teaching us how to live happily ever after, as we've heard in fairy tales.
Yakov Smirnoff
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When the needs of one person are being met by the other, there is laughter.
Yakov Smirnoff
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In Russia, if a male athelete loses he becomes a female athelete.
Yakov Smirnoff
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Falling in love is a chemical reaction. But it wears off in a year.
Yakov Smirnoff
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Balance is so important in our lives. In our busy world, we can give ourselves balance between thinking and feeling.
Yakov Smirnoff
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I believe there is a direct correlation between love and laughter.
Yakov Smirnoff
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In America, you assassinate president. In Soviet Russia, president assassinate you!
Yakov Smirnoff
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I was not only typecast as a Russian, but I was typecast as Yakov Smirnoff. This is understandable, and I was very happy to get the roles, but it would be nice to be in a movie where I could be someone else.
Yakov Smirnoff
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In Russia we only had two TV channels. Channel One was propaganda. Channel Two consisted of a KGB officer telling you: Turn back at once to Channel One.
Yakov Smirnoff
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If you have something important to say, Broadway and New York are great places to say it.
Yakov Smirnoff
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Homosexuality in Russia is a crime and the punishment is seven years in prison, locked up with the other men. There is a three year waiting list.
Yakov Smirnoff
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If love is the treasure, laughter is the key.
Yakov Smirnoff
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We have been learning since we were children how to make money, buy things, build things. The whole education system is set up to teach us how to think, not to feel.
Yakov Smirnoff
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Americans think Soviets are so grim. I want them to see that they can smile.
Yakov Smirnoff
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Russian men have a saying: Women are like buses... That's it.
Yakov Smirnoff
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In America, you drive car. In Soviet Russia, car drive you!
Yakov Smirnoff
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I found out that when you get married the man becomes the head of the house. And the woman becomes the neck, and she turns the head any way she wants to.
Yakov Smirnoff