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Men and women are immigrants in each other's worlds.
Yakov Smirnoff
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Yakov Smirnoff
Age: 73
Born: 1951
Born: January 24
Actor
Comedian
Odesa
Yakov Naumovich Pokhis
Immigrants
Worlds
Women
Men
World
More quotes by Yakov Smirnoff
I came to America to make it my home, and I did.
Yakov Smirnoff
We have been learning since we were children how to make money, buy things, build things. The whole education system is set up to teach us how to think, not to feel.
Yakov Smirnoff
In America, you assassinate president. In Soviet Russia, president assassinate you!
Yakov Smirnoff
I believe there is a direct correlation between love and laughter.
Yakov Smirnoff
In America, your job determines your marks. In Soviet Russia, Marx determine your job!
Yakov Smirnoff
The reason gas prices are so high is because the oil is in Texas and Oklahoma and all the dipsticks are in Washington.
Yakov Smirnoff
The ad in the paper said 'Big Sale. Last Week.' Why advertise? I already missed it. They're just rubbing it in.
Yakov Smirnoff
I fed my ego, but not my soul.
Yakov Smirnoff
Homosexuality in Russia is a crime and the punishment is seven years in prison, locked up with the other men. There is a three year waiting list.
Yakov Smirnoff
I found out that when you get married the man becomes the head of the house. And the woman becomes the neck, and she turns the head any way she wants to.
Yakov Smirnoff
Russian men have a saying: Women are like buses... That's it.
Yakov Smirnoff
A Russian Reversal quote on Uncyclopedia's Soviet Union article? How original.
Yakov Smirnoff
Balance is so important in our lives. In our busy world, we can give ourselves balance between thinking and feeling.
Yakov Smirnoff
In Soviet Russia, party always finds you!
Yakov Smirnoff
In America, you can always find a party. In Soviet Russia, The Party can always find you!
Yakov Smirnoff
After the Soviet Union collapsed, people thought I wasn't funny anymore.
Yakov Smirnoff
In America, you drive car. In Soviet Russia, car drive you!
Yakov Smirnoff
In every country, they make fun of city. In U.S. you make fun of Cleveland. In Russia, we make fun of Cleveland.
Yakov Smirnoff
I believe that love and laughter can only happen when one person takes the time to think about what would cause the other person to feel good.
Yakov Smirnoff
My father described this tall lady who stands in the middle of the New York harbor, holding high a torch to welcome people seeking freedom in America. I instantly fell in love.
Yakov Smirnoff